The Poor, Elderly, Retired Tax Preparer
Have your own psycho ex? Get a FREE Report on "Why Co-Parenting Doesn't Work", or learn how to win child custody with a custody coach.
One evening late last week, my phone rang. I was surprised to see my tax preparer’s name pop up on my display. My taxes are done. Refunds paid. Pretty straightforward, single W-2 easy squeezy tax return year.
I came to know of “Pete” the tax preparer through a friend. Pete is somewhere on the top side of 70 and he is a retired accountant and tax preparer. One of the nicest, most pleasant men you would ever want to meet. As sharp as anyone I know. He and his wife are great people. He is also extremely informative and helpful when it comes to taxes and tax prep.
I answer the phone pleasantly enough only to be greeted with what was a mild panic attack on the part of Pete. It seems he was on vacation for the prior couple of weeks with his wife. He returned to find a DHL Express Letter at his door-step. Inside, a subpoena to appear and testify at the hearing which had already passed a week earlier. Poor guy.
He was upset and thought he might be in trouble for not appearing, repeatedly explaining he was on vacation. I managed to calm him down by explaining that the matter was continued until a later date and that he would be in no trouble. (I’m guessing he had never been subpoenaed before.)
He asked the obvious questions and his panic turned quickly to irritation. Why was he needed? What the hell information could he provide? I asked to speak frankly and he gave me the green light. So, I replied, “Quite simply, Pete, my ex-wife is a crazy bitch and I’m very sorry that you’ve been bothered with my personal mess. She thinks I have some hidden income and I guess her and her attorney believe that you are privy to such information despite being provided a W-2 and a copy of my tax return.” He agreed that he has nothing to testify about that isn’t on the tax return and was going to call PEW’s attorney and tell her so.
After some idle chit-chat, we hung up. I hope he is still my tax preparer when I call him again next year. I haven’t heard from the friend from whom I got the referral and I’ll just hope that word doesn’t get back to her. I’m sure that this guy doesn’t need this kind of stress.
The collateral damage a PEW can cause is limitless. She has twice failed in her attempts to prove to the court that I have “hidden income.” That’s because I don’t have any hidden income. My bank accounts and debt load is a testament to that reality. It does still astound me the expense she will incur to embark on this journey a third time given her financial predicament. What’s really astounding is that her scumbag attorney, Bulldog, will extract fees from PEW rather than tell her, “PEW, it’s very likely that this layoff situation is a temporary predicament. This isn’t going to cost you a whole lot of money to do this by the book, after all, your children are entitled to your financial assistance in these troubled times.” Okay, I can actually hear some of you laughing at that last part. Trust me, though, there are some good attorneys out there who would give you the straight scoop on where you stand. I have one of them. I wonder how long it will be before this one bails on her client?
Leave it to PEW to think a life-long accountant and tax-preparer would risk fraud and the wrath of the IRS for doing a $200 basic tax return.
May 26th, 2009 at 3:17 pm
Mister-M: My DH has his taxes done by a nice older lady for years when he was married to his ex. He always assumed everything was straight forward as he didn’t make much money, so didn’t get much back. The last year his taxes were done by this nice old lady was 2004 tax year. He was still married to PEW at the end of 2004, so he filed married joint….or so he thought. At the time of the divorce in 2005, he tried to get copies of the tax returns from PEW, but she kept coming up with more and more excuses. Finally he found the old lady and asked her for copies. It took a few weeks before she called him back, but when she did, she said he should come see her and she would explain in person. I guess PEW had not filed the return jointly, and filed 2 returns for each of them. DH got $2500 in a refund, but it was sent to an account held by PEW. He was told his refund was $400, which she claimed she used to pay off his truck (it wasn’t paid off). The lady was nice enough to admit she did not confirm the filing status with him, and she knew he could have gotten her into a lot of trouble for falsifying tax return. I didn’t agree with his decision to let it go, but considering all he went through that year, the tax return was pretty minor in comparison.
May 27th, 2009 at 8:38 am
This attorney is a piece of work for sure.
You gave them a work W-2 which matched the return. That should be the end of it. She has to believe that you are forging one or both of these documents to be screaming for schedules and subpoena’ing the accountant.
I guess if your crazy client screams and yells that there is hidden income you either have to find it or prove her wrong by de-bunking every possible scenario. Why not you are getting paid no matter what happens — which of course explains all of this…..the crazier the client the more you are gonna make. Where is PEW getting the money for all this — maybe psycho sister is paying a lot more then they are disclosing?
May 27th, 2009 at 8:55 am
She probably wants her cut of that bagful of cans you recycled for $3.
May 27th, 2009 at 9:56 am
Schotts… I have no doubt that PP is paying more in rent than PEW is disclosing and I think that projection is driving her obsession with the hidden income allegations.
As for how she is paying for all of this… I have no idea.
May 27th, 2009 at 11:33 am
Many of these protracted custody cases are wars of financial attrition. When nobody will back down (like when the parents are a BPD vs. a concerned father), then it comes down to who runs out of money first.
My PEG doesn’t like to work, and has always sponged off her father. Well, he was actually a pretty good guy (left a lot to be desired as a parent though), until he died and left everything to his wife (PEG’s mother).
PEG’s mother was the classic “negative advocate.” She bought into everything PEG told her about me, how awful I was, etc. So she has fully funded the fight to destroy me. Mister-M, we lost the lottery when we hooked up and had kids with a BPD, but if there is any way it can be worse it is when you hook up with a BPD with infinite funding.
Before her Father died, PEG’s parents bought her a nice big house. She claimed to be paying rent for this house to the tune of $1800/month, with her “landlord” being her mother. This is completely impossible because her only income is my CS of just under $1000/month (yes, that’s $1,000/month + medical for one kid since BEFORE she was born).
Well, when she filed for more child support a couple years ago, the gloves came off. I subpoena’ed Grandma’s tax returns and rental records. The only thing she produced was a “rental agreement,” backdated of course to show that they didn’t just draw it up when asked for some proof.
With all the delays in hearings, PEG’s mother died before I could get her on the stand (yes, my daughter was sad — she loved her grandmother, and has no idea that this person was funding a war against her Dad).
The death of PEG’s mother opens a whole new aspect of the case. PEG is an only child, and stands to inherit the entire estate, which might be pretty large — the house alone is estimated on Zillow as worth $550K).
After waiting a tasteful period of time, I’ve subpoena’ed all records relating to PEG’s mother’s will and PEG’s inheritance. She is, of course, doing everything she can to evade discovery. But she continues to live in the house her parents bought for her, and has yet to explain to whom she now pays her monthly “rent.”
Isn’t this all just so…..sophisticated? LOL. Do I enjoy aggressively digging into the finances of a dead person? No. But this is war. I endured depositions, my employer was subpoena’ed, my tax guy was subpoena’ed. Mister-M is right about “collateral damage.” I’ve lived this hell for 14 years now, and it is clear that this enemy will not rest until she is vanquished. She has wrought this, not I, and now it is all crumbling down around her.
Hearing is June 8. Still hoping for sole legal and supervised visitation for PEG (until she progresses in treatment for BPD). Though my daughter is doing better now that she’s with us, I owe attorneys and witnesses lots of money. My wife is at her wits end. I can’t wait for this to be over.