The Psycho Ex Wife

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Mix in a little Psycho Ex-Wife and anything is possible!

Prior to the “Pearly Whites“ saga, was the 2-years prior dental visit for the children, which occurred in October of 2005. This was about a 1-1/2 years after our split and after I had moved about 3-1/2 hours away having been forced to sell the marital home. This, after exhaustive efforts to try to keep it to minimize the upset in the children’s lives.

Once I had relocated, it was as if anything that happened before that time ceased to exist. Anything and everything bad which occurred in PEW’s life was as a result of my relocation, which you’ll find whenever it is we happen to get this entire debacle “caught up.” I thought it good to toss out the predecessor to “Pearly Whites” to wrap-up it’s evolution.

What is interesting about this is that the dentist did take the insurance. The problem was, she kept giving them the health-insurance card and not the dental-insurance card.

—————
10/18/2005

LM,

I had to pay $255.00 out of pocket this morning for the dentist. Obviously if I send this form in they are going to send the re-imbursement to you. Can you pay me and I will give you the receipt to send in to your insurance company? I would really appreciate it due to the fact that I wasn’t expecting this expense and I am already paying $3000 for this evaluation this month.

Thanks,

PEW

I replied…

PEW,

As soon as the reimbursement check comes, I will send it directly to you.

You should have 6-months now to double-check which local dentist will handle the claim for us, otherwise, I can arrange to take them to the dentist here at some point next year.

~LM

Good question. Solid reply. Two grown-ups cooperating and communicating effectively. Right? Wrong! Her reply to the above, strangely enough, comes two-days later.

10/20/2005

LM,

Sure you will, that’s ok though because we’ll be meeting in court for my legal fees and the evaluation fee, so I’ll just keep track of all these little things.

Also, you are welcome to take them to the dentist down there, I never said not to. I think it would be great if you took part in their care every once in a while.

Also, S1 is definately allergic to something in hot dogs. He has had a bad reaction every time he’s eaten them over the past month. Last night, his face got all red, it looked almost like anphylaxis (don’t know how to spell it) and he was sick to his stomach until he finally threw up. Please make sure everyone knows not to let him eat hot dogs. It’s probably one of the preservatives or something, but the reaction has gotten progressively worse everytime.

PEW

There you have it. The vacuum-cleaner is on and I will be sucked into the fray with the snide-remarks.

Worthy of note, at the time, if the boys weren’t having hot dogs for approximately 10 of their meals per week, perhaps he wouldn’t have had a reaction, Nurse Anphylaxis.

LM - DON’T DO IT! DON’T DO IT!!! (sigh) - He did it.

PEW,

As much as you would like to believe yourself the martyr, I take great care of the children. And then, those few times where I need YOU to do that “co-parenting” you so often pontificate about but you never effectively participate in yourself… whether it’s his poor eating habits when he’s with you… following an appropriate rules set consistently… the gun-play and finding out what software gun and killing games your neighbor’s 6 year old is playing with S1 (or at the very least letting him watch)…

…you just ignore them, opting instead to continue to dwell on the past and start fights and name-call and re-write history to avoid accepting responsibility for the decisions you’ve made along the way.

I know that you can’t help yourself and I really pray for the day you can finally stop and get on with your life without all of the animosity and almost pathological desire to be combative with me.

~LM

—–

LM,

Keep telling yourself that, if it helps you sleep at night. Everytime I tried to do the co-parenting thing with you it blew up in my face.

As far as S1’s eating habits, did you read the evaluator’s report. Maybe you should read it again.

It’s interesting what you say here below because I haven’t made ANY bad decisions along the way. I simply did what I needed to do to get away from you. You are the one who thought of only yourself.

As far as moving on with my life, I have, but you make that as difficult as you possibly can by continuing with the custody evaluation after custody evaluation after custody evaluation. And your constant harrassment about stupid issues and continuing to tell people I am unstable etc..etc…etc… But that’s about to be cleared up once and for all and everyone will see how vindictive and hateful you really are.

Is it ever going to get any better than this?

PEW

Another creepy thing PEW often does is re-use phraseology that I often mindlessly used when debating with her. The “if it helps you sleep well at night” is one I (too) often used and then it would come back at me.

It’s interesting to note her upset at my sharing the stories with my support system. You can’t begin to imagine the things she would tell people, including the children, about me. Actually, you’ve seen some of them already, what the hell am I saying?

Also, exaggerate much? We, at that point, had 2-custody evaluations. #2 was required by the court over my objections. I was willing to take my chances with evaluator #1s horrendous effort. My objection was declined, of course, because forcing us into another country CE exercise meant more money for the Divorce Cartel. We were later forced by the court to go to evaluation #3 (and we chose to go private this time) because evaluator #2 “forgot” to detail in the report that I was going for primary custody. The judge ruled that she would not hear the case because that omission meant a guaranteed grounds for appeal by either side no matter how she ruled and she wasn’t going to waste the time hearing the case.

PEW - the issues over which I have expressed concern are not “stupid” issues and your categorizing them as such is yet another prime example of how uncooperative you truly are. You continue to revise history and lay the blame for all of your life’s trials and tribulations at my feet. Not only aren’t you honest with others, you’re not honest with yourself and that’s quite sad.

Any genuine concern of mine has been met with the usual and customary name-calling, blaming everything on my relocation, and rarely, if ever, met with any real consideration from you. Despite that, it is important that I continue to express my concerns as they arise and simply deal with your inability to set aside your personal issues with me to truly consider what those concerns mean for the children. Even with regard to the recent issues regarding the “gun play” topic - you probably couldn’t even explain to yourself how your ongoing, mean-spirit references to my non-existent “impotence” and calling DW “ugly” have anything to do with the issues that I bring up. I don’t bring up my personal life - you do - and you only do so to continue the verbal abuse and manipulation that plagued our entire relationship. You should stop it.

Maybe one day, we can discuss issues regarding our children without your campaign of name-calling and blame. Perhaps one day, you will hold your tongue when I want to discuss matters pertaining to the children and simply discuss - the children - and do so without your sarcastic tone.

~LM

As if that’s going to work.

LM,

I can’t even believe I am responding to you again……..you and DW insulted me on the phone, so I retaliated. Don’t even say that isn’t the case. And you were impotent, why would I make that up?? I’m very happy that DW cured you, but when you were with me you were. I guess it was me, but I never had to deal with that type of issue before I met you (or since).

I have cooperated with everything you have asked of me. There is no “gun-play” going on. He’s not playing video games over there. I always address your concerns…..always. The eating, exersize, consistency, distractions during phone calls….everything you’ve brought up, I have made efforts to remedy.

You are the one who is not honest with yourself or anyone else. This is called “Transferance” and it’s typical for you. Everything you say to me is exactly what you are guilty of. It’s actually kind of scary. Now stop emailing me AGAIN

PEW

Is that what it’s called, doctor? It’s called projection and your picture is next to the definition in Webster’s Dictionary.

DW has talked on the phone with PEW 2-times, if I remember correctly. Maybe it was once. Therefore, I’m certain that DW didn’t insult her and I’m pretty sure I didn’t.

So, there you have it. A discussion which was intended to be about a reimbursement for OOP dental expenses went from:

Dentist >>> Hot Dogs and “Anphylaxis” >>> Co-Parenting >>> Impotence.

It’s the path of insanity in which I was all-too-often a willing participant.