Pay attention, folks… this is a back to history post! Keep your eyes on the category labels. Maybe in a few years I will have completely bridged the gap between history and present day!
By this time, the news had already broken about my job change and relocation. If you need to catch up, just click on the 2005 category label and go back a page or two. She was about to be abandoned by her first attorney and I was about to release my original attorney in favor of D-Mac who specialized in family court and divorce matters.
A lot had transpired up to this exchange and I was pushing PEW to agree to a reversal of the every-other-weekend situation for the summer to maximize the time I had with the children. It was early April of 2005 and we had informed The Psycho Ex-Wife about our planned summer vacation time (story for later, mentioning it here to let you know we gave her more than 3-months advanced notice). I was moving for primary custody of the children myself, but anticipating another round of custody evaluations, I was fairly convinced that the matter wouldn’t be settled by the end of the summer. For the summer, I proposed the following schedule via email:
PEW,
In an effort to resolve this and perhaps avoid the expense of Custody Evaluations, Inc. and eventually a court date (and associated legal fees)… I suggest the following schedule:
After S1’s school year is over, the following Summer schedule is proposed:
6/26 evening until 7/8 evening with Father.
7/8 evening until 7/10 evening with Mother.
7/10 evening until 7/22 evening with Father.
7/22 evening until 7/29 evening with Mother.
7/29 evening until 8/5 evening with Father.
8/5 evening until 8/7 evening with Mother.
8/7 evening until 8/14 evening with Father.
8/14 evening until 8/21 evening with Mother.
8/21 evening until 9/4 evening with Father.
9/5 we revert back to school year every other weekend schedule with you having primary custody.
~LM
Straight-forward and specific. There is no ambiguity here. I can also tell you, there was no flexibility on my part with regard to this schedule. For 9-1/2 months out of the year, she was potentially going to have primary custody. It wasn’t too much to ask that for 2-1/2 months, I enjoy the same schedule.
Her reply:
LM,
I’m tired of your criticism. You moved 400 miles away from your children. You aren’t here to help out with the day to day stuff….at all. Don’t blame it on me. Anyone who keeps a file on their spouse the way you did deserves to get divorced. You moved to [home state] for LM, not for the kid’s future, who are you kidding. You are a sick sick person LM. I heard all the stuff you’ve told our friends and your family about my “alleged” mental illness and it just sickens me that you think people actually buy it. I’m telling you ONCE and for ALL to stop harrassing me or I will take legal action against you for harrassment. I am doing the best I can with the kids ALL BY MYSELF. There is nothing wrong with my state of mind except that I married a controlling, overbearing abusive abusive person. LEAVE ME ALONE!!!
As for your schedule, NO….I want to go back to Custody Evaluations, Inc. because I have alot of things that I believe need to be addressed with regards to you and YOUR behavior. It’s already cost me over $20000.00, what’s another $5-10K.
STOP CRITICIZING ME…..THAT IS WHY I DIVORCED YOU!!
On another note, my “friend” [Kevin] is coming with me on Friday to keep me company on the long ride. Please extend the same courtesy to him that I extend to DW.
~PEW
Harassment? I offered a summer schedule. That’s it. “All the people I told” were perhaps maybe some in my family and at that point, I was still believing it was bipolar disorder. I hadn’t learned about borderline personality disorder until a few months from this time. The last thing I was doing was broadcasting it to anyone beyond that.
Notice her martyrdom, too. She hasn’t been doing anything with the kids “all by herself.” Further, the only reason she was having them more than I was… her fight for primary custody. Funny how that works. Spend tens-of-thousands of dollars to fight for primary custody and then cry “poor me” about having it.
All the rest of it - pure projection.
Back in January of 2005, I discussed our mutual disclosure of seeing people. She wasn’t specific, nor was I, until it was time for there to be interaction between the children and DW. At that point, I had disclosed the address and phone number so that she knew where I was taking the children at her rightful insistence.
My reply:
PEW,
I will absolutely extend you the same courtesy. Please be advised, that I would like the same courtesy from Kevin that DW extended you, including full name, address, and phone number. I believe I deserve the same courtesy in that regard in knowing who it is my children may be spending time with.
Thanks in advance.
As for Friday night… where are we meeting? I would like to plan our respective departures to minimize the downtime for either side. Also, if you would kindly pack whatever clothes you would like them to wear when they come home, I would greatly appreciate it.
~LM
It seemed a reasonable request.
LM,
The kids don’t go to Kevin’s house LM. He doesn’t spend the night here, we don’t spend the night at his place. I have class, I don’t just shack up with the first person that comes along. The reason I wanted DW’s name and Address is because you were taking them to her home 400 miles away. The phone number so that I could reach you in case of emergency. So no, you may not have that information. You LIVE with DW, I do not LIVE with Kevin. If you need to reach me in an emergency you have my parents phone #’s, my sister’s #, my brothers #’s.
We are meeting at [an exit 20 miles closer to PEW]. I have never gotten off there so I don’t know what is there yet. My estimated departure time is approx 6:30pm.
And like I said before….STOP HARRASSING ME PLEASE.
~PEW
There she goes again with the mindless harassment accusation. Interestingly, she is unwilling to disclose the information about her boyfriend as I was willing to disclose the same about my girlfriend. The disclosure was made before we were living together, I might add, and given as it was someone with whom the children would be interacting. Fairness doesn’t register with psychos, though. Additionally, more take-take-take. Rather than meet where we had previously arranged, she changed the location to a spot more convenient for her. Always remember that as you read these and future posts. Her concern about travel time with the children and me is only a concern when it’s not convenient for her. In this situation, we had a planned weekend getaway with all of the children.
As I was blind copying DW on all exchanges, DW chimes in to me only…
LM,
She harrassed you about my address and phone way before you were living here and before the boys even spent time here. Of course we know that’s a one way street.
She needs to be clear that if we have a set time it needs to be set. We will be leaving at 7 the next morning, I do not plan on getting in at midnight again, which could be later for us now considering the fact that we have further to drive. And if she is seriously concerned about her children, she should think of meeting us on Mon as well as we are driving 12 hours, 8 of it with her children.
DW
You also might want to make her aware that I read everything and she needs to make sure she doesn’t talk about me like that again. Not to mention stop harrassing you.
She’s correct. However, PEW doesn’t care.
The purpose of this post is to establish a time-line for PEW’s relationship escapades. She would later lie about this in court, not that anything would happen (and in reality - it really didn’t matter). In January of 2005, she informed me that she had been seeing someone since October (of 2004). I couldn’t tell you if it was Kevin all this time, but at this point, it’s April of 2005 and she’s disclosed a relationship again. Later, she would say that by this time, she was only seeing Kevin “for three weeks.” One would think that after all that bellyaching about the children meeting DW “way too soon” (at 6- or 7-months)… the kids meeting Kevin after 3-weeks would be an offense punishable by death!
