The Psycho Ex Wife

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The PEW is a real prize of stability and self-control.  I often wonder how many readers go through the “notable crazy e-mail, totally unsolicited and out-of-the-blue” like those in what will soon become a lengthy Notable Crazy Email Series.

This one is a treat and I’m going to code this with the “more” tag due to it’s extreme level of vulgarity and rage.  Proceed at your own risk.

SUBJECT:  TO DW

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The summer of 2007 was no different than most in one respect.  That one respect was that it would have some major malfunction due to the destructive nature of the PEW.  2005 were the threats from her, her family, and the alienation efforts of all of them.  In 2006, it was serious ramp-up of the parental alienation, particularly via the phone calls to the children as we had them as primary custodians for that summer.  In 2007, it was the phone calls to the police, the sheriff, and false allegation of child abuse with child protective services.  Hell, even having the children hold hands is child abuse to PEW.

June of 2007 was sad enough.  My last surviving grandparent, a grandmother, passed away.  I had the children in [home state] and would have to travel to [custody state] to attend.  It was because of my time at the funeral that PEW would call Child Protective Service and file a false allegation of child abuse against DW as she was watching all of the children.  Technically, it was against both of us, but since I wasn’t there, we know that her motivation was to hang this false allegation of child abuse right at the feet of DW.

On the weekend in question, it was the one and only time she would come to see the children engaged in their swim team activities.  A major swim meet was taking place and she actually did come to [home state] to witness their efforts.  It was generally uneventful.  She kept the boys with her at the hotel for the weekend and engaged in some interesting activities around the area.  She came to the swim meet and there were no problems.  All exchanges were uneventful and overall, everything appeared to go “swimmingly.”

What we didn’t realize at the time was what was taking place behind the scenes and all during the following week which results in this timeline of events…

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Oh, what a treat when she comes out of nowhere with both barrels a’blazin’!

With the very fewest exceptions, I make the children lunch every single day they are with me.  I rotate their different favorites, toss in a snack, some fruit, and a drink.  Nothing out of the ordinary.  Every rare once-in-a-while I get lazy.  Most times I make lunch the night before and have it ready to go.  Fewer times, I make it in the morning during breakfast.  Rarely, I just don’t frigging feel like it and give them each $2.10 to buy the school lunch.

So, imagine my surprise when I get this gem without warning…

LM, If you are having the kids buy lunch when they are with you send them with lunch money. I put money in the account so they can buy when they are with me if I want them to. Last week S2 owed $10 from the previous week that I had to pay so that he could buy. And now I just got low balance notifications, so if they are buying… send money cheapskate!!!

Isn’t it amazing how condescending someone can be when they’re collecting child support from a parent who has more than half of the total custody time, is unemployed and is thus making significantly less money than her?

Originally, I was disinclined to respond, but was curious.  If you remember the Food Deprivation Series, you know that this is a discussion not worth pursuing, but still ironic since less than one year ago, she was encouraging them to buy lunch when they were with me and I was packing lunch.  So I figured I would ask the boys about it.  Smart and savvy they are - it would appear that they occasionally “forget” to use the cash I give them since they are in the habit of just going through the line, giving their pin number and moving on to chow.

Giving them the benefit of the doubt, I urge them to “not forget in the future.”

PEW,

I send them with money the rare time I send them without a homemade lunch. One time last week, I left the house without my wallet and I will send them home to you with $4.20 this week. I actually meant to do it last week.

Other than that single time, I always send them with lunch money.

I spoke to the boys this morning and they said that sometimes they forget to use the money when I send it with them, so that might account for the shortfall. Of course, it’s probably in their bank here or there.

Way to overreact like a petulant child, again.

~LM

Yes, I tossed a dig in there.  A rare moment of weakness.  As expected, it comes with another reply.

[drum-roll please...............................................................................]

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Among the great many other things that occurred in the aftermath of PEW’s discovery of this site, comes another completely delusional text message - this one, from Aunt Drunkenslob (Psycho-SIL) and was unsolicited.  They just don’t know how to stop.

The Text, From Psycho-SIL, 8/24/2009, 8:31PM

I never thought u would stoop 2 this level.  I don’t even know who you are anymore.  I used 2 tell [pew] he would nevdr hurt the boys but those days r gone.

It’s short, thank Heavens for a 160-character limit, but chock full of bullshit, fueled by substance abuse and untreated mental illness.

“I never thought u would stoop 2 this level.”

“Stooping” to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the entire, ugly, abusive, harassing, disgusting truth is something I imagine they all PRAYED I wouldn’t do.  But alas, I’ve done it.  At least I’ve given them the courtesy of not publicly naming them.  Apparently, within minutes of this site’s discovery, they took care of publicly naming themselves to others - friends, family, the kids, who knows who else - for yet some other inexplicably stupid reason.

My guess is that they counted on me “keeping” all of these sick, ugly occurrences secret - simply so that they could continue on unabated.  Reality is - since I have publicly shamed no one, I didn’t really do anything to anyone.  However, in their delusional belief that EVERYONE they tell, even within their own family, will believe none of it to be true - is the most bizarre part of this entire charade.  They may never say it to their faces… but if anyone in my family did a fraction of what I’ve shared here, I’d be wondering what the hell was wrong with them and making at least a small attempt to intervene.

I don’t even know who you are anymore.

She never did.  She never has.  She never will.  SIL needs serious help.  And it’s an absolute disgrace that this family hides her problems, behavior, sickness, and alcoholism and continues to let her self-destruct.  Worse, she’s going to hurt, maim, or kill someone.  It’s only a matter of time.  And then blood will not only be on her hands, but her family’s as well.  But… her family keeps bailing her ass out and totally ignoring just how sick she is.

That said, I know who she is.  You best believe this - every day these children are out of my custody - I pray that it isn’t their blood that ends up on her hands or anyone else’s in that family.

I used 2 tell [pew] he would nevdr hurt the boys but those days r gone.

No one gives a shit what she used to tell anyone.  I’m surprised with her substance abuse problems that she can even remember her name, let alone anything you alleged used to tell PEW about me.

Seriously - get some help before you kill yourself or worse - kill someone else.

We’ve occasionally discussed what we thought might happen should the website be discovered.  We’re pretty sure that any number of things might occur and we’re pretty convinced that none of them would be particularly good.

We often speculate what might occur…

• PEW would call CPS (again).
• Maybe get her dumbass father to leave us a nice voice-mail again so he can say things like “whore” and “slut” and be all tough-guy on our asses.
• PEW would call her normal brothers and see if they would beat me up on her behalf (despite them knowing how absolutely off-the-chain both PEW and Psycho-SIL are).
• Threaten court (again).
• She would project all of her self-hatred outward onto me (again).
• She’ll definitely “tell my dad” on me.  My dad, not her dad.
• She’ll tell others in my family.
• Maybe she might send an email, that might look like this:

LM,

I have decided that tomorrow I am sending a letter to [CSE] asking them to terminate your child support payments to me. Then I am taking the entire contents of your www.thepsychoexwife.com website to court with me….I’m asking for an emergency hearing…because you have lost it. The whole scary thing is printed out, particularly the part where DW says she hates our kids…and they have social and behavioral problems…someday if they choose to be like me “they will have to go their own way”? I’m scared….this is scary…I’ve read it all and with every new article, it just got scarier. You are a scary scary individual….and DW is JUST as scary. You do not have to pay for the braces…..I did not realize how sick you actually were. I will pay for the braces by myself. I’m going to consult with a child psychologist and find out if the kids should know about this, because I can tell you…despite what they tell you, they are very loving and affectionate to me and I am to them as well….I’m thinking you and ugly have a big HATE expedition going on over there….it’s not healthy….and it’s weird since I granted you without a fight 50/50 custody…gave you a huge break on child support….I don’t even know who you’re talking about on that website, but it aint ME. Please don’t kill me….because as I was reading it that’s all I was thinking, you’re nuts. Keep your money…make love to it, wallpaper with it….make a loin cloth out of it….use it for psychotherapy (highly recommended) just stay the fuck away from me.

This is the last email you will ever receive from me.

you’re sick…. PEW

Well… that’s what I imagine it would look like if just such a discovery were to occur.  And if just such an email would actually be the result, I might be inclined to have the following thoughts based upon quotes from just such an email:

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