More About Me...

The Psycho Ex Wife is the true account of a marriage, divorce, and subsequent custody fight between a loving man, his terroristic ex-wife who we suspect suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder (at least from our armchair psychologist diagnosis), and the husband's new partner. We are not simply anti-mother or pro-father ... Read more

Why Talk About It...

The site is intended to help people in similar situations. I have always felt like no one really knew or quite understood the level of chaos that had existed in my life, and this is a way to express it all without burdening personal friends and family with such horrors ... Read More

Archive: 2009

Happy Thanksgiving to Everyone from All of Us

Have your own psycho ex? Get a FREE Report on "Why Co-Parenting Doesn't Work", or learn how to win child custody with a custody coach.

From our family to yours, we wish everyone the Happiest Thanksgiving of all for all of you and your loved ones.

May your day be full of great food, great family, and great friends.  Most importantly, may be it full of peace and love for all of you.

Most Sincerely,

Mister-M, DW, and the crew

Unsolicited Text From Psycho-SIL

Among the great many other things that occurred in the aftermath of PEW’s discovery of this site, comes another completely delusional text message - this one, from Aunt Drunkenslob (Psycho-SIL) and was unsolicited.  They just don’t know how to stop.

The Text, From Psycho-SIL, 8/24/2009, 8:31PM

I never thought u would stoop 2 this level.  I don’t even know who you are anymore.  I used 2 tell [pew] he would nevdr hurt the boys but those days r gone.

It’s short, thank Heavens for a 160-character limit, but chock full of bullshit, fueled by substance abuse and untreated mental illness.

“I never thought u would stoop 2 this level.”

“Stooping” to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the entire, ugly, abusive, harassing, disgusting truth is something I imagine they all PRAYED I wouldn’t do.  But alas, I’ve done it.  At least I’ve given them the courtesy of not publicly naming them.  Apparently, within minutes of this site’s discovery, they took care of publicly naming themselves to others - friends, family, the kids, who knows who else - for yet some other inexplicably stupid reason.

My guess is that they counted on me “keeping” all of these sick, ugly occurrences secret - simply so that they could continue on unabated.  Reality is - since I have publicly shamed no one, I didn’t really do anything to anyone.  However, in their delusional belief that EVERYONE they tell, even within their own family, will believe none of it to be true - is the most bizarre part of this entire charade.  They may never say it to their faces… but if anyone in my family did a fraction of what I’ve shared here, I’d be wondering what the hell was wrong with them and making at least a small attempt to intervene.

I don’t even know who you are anymore.

She never did.  She never has.  She never will.  SIL needs serious help.  And it’s an absolute disgrace that this family hides her problems, behavior, sickness, and alcoholism and continues to let her self-destruct.  Worse, she’s going to hurt, maim, or kill someone.  It’s only a matter of time.  And then blood will not only be on her hands, but her family’s as well.  But… her family keeps bailing her ass out and totally ignoring just how sick she is.

That said, I know who she is.  You best believe this - every day these children are out of my custody - I pray that it isn’t their blood that ends up on her hands or anyone else’s in that family.

I used 2 tell [pew] he would nevdr hurt the boys but those days r gone.

No one gives a shit what she used to tell anyone.  I’m surprised with her substance abuse problems that she can even remember her name, let alone anything you alleged used to tell PEW about me.

Seriously - get some help before you kill yourself or worse - kill someone else.

An Open Letter to The Psycho Ex-Wife (a.k.a. PEW, Liz, Bob…)

Since the discovery of ThePsychoExWife.com, we’ve watched PEW go through a couple of stages.

The first stage, of course, was her contention that she would never email or talk to us again.  From there, it was eliminating child support, and filing an emergency petition to take the boys away from LM.  None of these has happened as of yet.

The second stage was one that none of us were present for, except the boys themselves. This is where she badgered, belittled, screamed, and threatened them, telling them, “I will drag your ass to court and make you choose me.”

The third stage, in case you missed it, was PEW writing comments, denigrating LM (link), DW, (link) family, and friends (link).

But the most bizarre stage was the final stage. She began commenting to herself to prop herself up.  I guess to herself and maybe the few other members of her family reading here who are probably not aware that she was both Liz and Bob (among others). Just like in real life, PEW has to make up fictional people that are on her side.

So, we’ve been discussing where to go from here.

This site wasn’t started to put PEW down.  If we wanted to do that, we would have responded to each and every one of her disgusting emails, text messages, and phone calls. We would have sent this site, with her readily identified, to everyone at her work, her family, her friends, everyone.  We didn’t do that and we certainly didn’t tell her about this site.  It’s not about her. It’s not about our alleged hatred of her. This site is about going through a divorce with a psycho ex-wife and what we must do in order to keep her out of our lives.  It’s to let others know they are not alone, and our hope to teach them how to handle their own situation better. In that regard, we want to keep this site focused on telling our story and what we’ve learned (and continue to learn) without interacting with PEW.  We have no need to interact with her.

Going forward, we will continue posting our back story in chronological order, without posting what is currently happening.  We choose to do this for two reasons. One - we do not want to respond to PEW, and if we post her emails and other antics with our response for you to read, she will also be reading.  Two - there will invariably be more court battles and we certainly don’t want to give her any knowledge of how we will be positioning ourselves.

Before we forge ahead, we offer an open-letter to PEW, PP, and anyone else supporting them:

PP - Please get help. Your family is not helping you and they won’t, especially PEW. (We’ve seen this before with EE’s illness and the priority they placed on preventing their embarrassment even as he sought to obtain help for himself - even disgustingly making fun of his plight while he was right smack in the middle of it.) She wants you to continue to fuck up your life because it makes her feel better about herself. The boys love you, they want you to get better. Check yourself into a rehab program, get back on your medication, and take control of your life. Yes, your Dad “fucked you up,” but the only one that can change, is you. Stop making excuses and get the help you deserve so you can be happy.

PEW - Let me spell a few things out for you. You are an abuser. You are abusive to everyone in your life. LM never abused you. A woman who has been abused for 10-years doesn’t contact her abuser 21-times in a single day. She doesn’t ask him to come back to her once she finally got free and is “happier than ever.” She doesn’t come to a website that he writes and try to engage him. Only someone who has no fear of someone does this.  Someone who was truly abused wants nothing to do with their abuser.

  • Calling CPS with false abuse allegations and making your own children go through interrogations is ABUSE
  • Alienating your kids and telling them “I will drag your ass to court and make you choose me” is ABUSE
  • Lying to them about their stepmother and how she calls you up all the time and calls you names is ABUSE
  • Telling the kids not to tell anyone when PP gets drunk and falls down the steps, scaring the hell out of them as they thought she was dead - is ABUSE
  • Having PP move-in when she is so clearly out of control is dangerous to the children, and exposing them to that kind of situation is ABUSE
  • Lying to them about their father and how he abandoned them and abused you is ABUSE
  • Alienating your kids by withholding phone calls and visits from their father is ABUSE
  • Telling the children about this website is ABUSE
  • The shit you allow your father to do to them and teach them is ABUSE

Why you would think I, or anyone else, would believe anything you say when you have lied about me, is beyond comprehension. Further, you are welcome for the following things:

  • The 16-hours of driving I did with LM every other weekend for 3 years to make sure “your” kids were safe
  • The hours I have spent shuttling “your” kids to sports and other classes, including the 3.5 hours I spent 5 days a week every swim team season
  • For helping to teach “your” children how to swim and dive
  • For helping try to teach “your” children to ride a bike
  • For helping teach “your” kids how to tie their shoes (while you continued to buy them slip-ons and velcro), dress themselves, and go to the bathroom without making a mess
  • For helping teach the boys about nutrition and exercise, and even the nutrition place mats I bought for your house
  • For all of the gifts, clothes, and events I’ve paid for over the last 5-years, while you lied to them about how I don’t care about them and my kids get so much more than they do
  • Especially for not telling them every time you denied us taking them somewhere fun, like NYC, Orlando, among other places.
  • For not putting you down to the children when you called CPS on us and they were crying wondering why you didn’t love them… every time the kids wondered why Dad didn’t call when he actually had… every time the kids reported the names you and your family have called me… every time they express abject fear that the day is coming when you will FORCE THEM TO CHOOSE… every time this, that, and the other… I’ll stop here as the list is long and exhaustive and frankly, we already know that you just don’t give a shit anyway.  For everything I do for them because I love them and LM - you’re welcome.

You need to apologize to your children, and MEAN IT. Don’t tell them you are sorry when you still intend to alienate them from their father and force them to choose you. Your children love BOTH OF YOU. Your children want BOTH OF YOU in their lives. Your children love their stepbrother and stepsister, and yes, they even love me. They have enough love to go around, and you should be grateful they have so many people in their lives that are willing to fight for them, in the face of your personal attacks. Most stepmothers would have left by now, but I can assure you I’m going to be around forever, because LM is a wonderful person, a wonderful father, and we have an amazing relationship. Something you might have some day if you get help. We implore you, for the sake of your boys, let them be happy, let them love both of their parents, stop interrogating them, stop threatening them, and let them be children.

As always, we will treat the children with respect, we will not denigrate you to them, but we will teach them how to deal with your outbursts on their own, because they don’t deserve to be abused by you, or anyone else. Get help, and think about this letter every time you yell at them, every time you ask them a question about us trying to get information that will help you take them from their father, every time you tell them they will be going to court when they are 12, and remember that you are abusing them.

The madness ends when you choose to stop it. On this website - your madness ends today.

Sincerely,
DW

PS - Much like everything else you speculate about, don’t profess to know what our current marital status is.  You don’t.

PPS - To anyone reading who might know any of us, if you encourage or support any of the things that PEW perpetrates on us, especially the children, you should be ashamed of yourselves.  You’re just as bad as she is.

The Inevitable Discovery of ThePsychoExWife.Com

We’ve occasionally discussed what we thought might happen should the website be discovered.  We’re pretty sure that any number of things might occur and we’re pretty convinced that none of them would be particularly good.

We often speculate what might occur…

  • PEW would call CPS (again).
  • Maybe get her dumbass father to leave us a nice voice-mail again so he can say things like “whore” and “slut” and be all tough-guy on our asses.
  • PEW would call her normal brothers and see if they would beat me up on her behalf (despite them knowing how absolutely off-the-chain both PEW and Psycho-SIL are).
  • Threaten court (again).
  • She would project all of her self-hatred outward onto me (again).
  • She’ll definitely “tell my dad” on me.  My dad, not her dad.
  • She’ll tell others in my family.
  • Maybe she might send an email, that might look like this:

LM,

I have decided that tomorrow I am sending a letter to [CSE] asking them to terminate your child support payments to me. Then I am taking the entire contents of your www.thepsychoexwife.com website to court with me….I’m asking for an emergency hearing…because you have lost it. The whole scary thing is printed out, particularly the part where DW says she hates our kids…and they have social and behavioral problems…someday if they choose to be like me “they will have to go their own way”? I’m scared….this is scary…I’ve read it all and with every new article, it just got scarier. You are a scary scary individual….and DW is JUST as scary. You do not have to pay for the braces…..I did not realize how sick you actually were. I will pay for the braces by myself. I’m going to consult with a child psychologist and find out if the kids should know about this, because I can tell you…despite what they tell you, they are very loving and affectionate to me and I am to them as well….I’m thinking you and ugly have a big HATE expedition going on over there….it’s not healthy….and it’s weird since I granted you without a fight 50/50 custody…gave you a huge break on child support….I don’t even know who you’re talking about on that website, but it aint ME. Please don’t kill me….because as I was reading it that’s all I was thinking, you’re nuts. Keep your money…make love to it, wallpaper with it….make a loin cloth out of it….use it for psychotherapy (highly recommended) just stay the fuck away from me.

This is the last email you will ever receive from me.

you’re sick…. PEW

Well… that’s what I imagine it would look like if just such a discovery were to occur.  And if just such an email would actually be the result, I might be inclined to have the following thoughts based upon quotes from just such an email:

(more…)

The Orthodontist War Heats Up

We take a pause in the Psycho-SIL criminal series for more pressing matters.  Also, because we still are waiting on several other reports.  I’ve previously written about this situation being all about the money - at least the power it has to make one’s life very, very difficult.  She tends to wield this power with impunity.

She applied more pressure on 8/14/09:

LM,

I’m making an appt today for S1 to get his first round of spacers. I will then submit the bill to DR for your half. You’re too much.

~PEW

This is a big problem. Whether anyone who frequents this blog chooses to believe it or not, I don’t have half of the $5,000 fee at the moment and S1’s teeth and palate will survive until I can get a job. People have survived since the dawn of time with crooked teeth. I want S1 to get his braces. He will get them when we get the financial situation righted.

If PEW is permitted to forge ahead unchallenged in this regard, it will only set us back further in a situation where we can ill-afford to be. Therefore, I felt compelled to reply, respectfully, and factually…

PEW,

Due to circumstances beyond my control, I am unable to agree with moving forward so soon on S1’s braces. You cannot make such decisions unilaterally as per the court order.

Sincerely,
LM

That was all I intended to say. This isn’t emergency medical treatment. It WILL get done. It does NOT need to get done “right now.” There are more important things at stake here, not that PEW can think beyond how much more quickly she can make life tougher on everyone. It’s not like dental care for the children was a priority for her before (see: Pearly Whites). Notice a pattern here? When I am under financial strain - she will go to great lengths to find ways to put additional pressure on me. The last dentistry issue arose during my layoff in 2007. I’m guessing you’re not shocked.

LM,

What?!?!? This is a medical necessity…have you looked at your son’s teeth. He is going to get abcesses in there. Where does the court order say that I do not have to get our children medical attention when it is needed?

~PEW

Here’s a mother who couldn’t be bothered to take the kids to the orthodontist, instead calling me at the very last minute on the day of their appointment with a bullshit excuse. She wasn’t at the appointment. She hasn’t even spoken with the orthodontist (at the time the email exchange took place), and like I’ve mentioned before - she has S1 perilously close to death as a result of my predicament. She does this with no basis to make the assumptions she has in the above email showing how terrified she is.

At the time of the appointment, the orthodontist expressed the following information:

  • The sooner it is done, the better for S1.
  • He can get braces at any time.
  • It wasn’t needed IMMEDIATELY, but if we wanted him to get used to them by the time school starts, we should move sooner rather than later.  It’s especially good at this age up to and including early teen years due to the softness of the palate and the ease of getting the teeth, palate, and jaw to move.

Keep in mind, that even the dentist made NO MENTION of the perilous fears about S1’s single crooked molar.  It is substantially out of place.  It wasn’t until I brought up the tooth that the dentist (one SHE chose) even thought to consider referring us to an orthodontist.

LM,

and by the way the circumstances are within your control….get a job.  Just because you refuse to get a job doesn’t mean the kids have to suffer.

~PEW

See: Rolleyes eyestrain. Unmerciful, cold-hearted, uncaring, CLICHE-SPEWING black-heart. Nevermind how the children are suffering while she takes $400/month from our household while she continues with her cycle of terror. She’s incapable of thinking of the children when there is an opportunity to ramp-up the drama.

LM,

I can’t believe you are going to risk losing legal custody over what amounts to be $2500 spread out over two years. Are you serious? I’m ok with this because you have left a 5 year paper trail of how you put your financial gain in front of the children….this is great especially on the heals of your child support fiasco….perfect timing LM.

~PEW

Cue the custody and support threats. So very predictable.

The reason this is a problem is because no matter what we agree to “off the books” or what the Orthodontist promises, etc.  If PEW incurs any expenses, all she has to do is turn it into to CSE and it gets the ball rolling.  Ultimately, that means more court, more legal fees, more waste, more abuse-by-legal-system.

If I thought for one second she would agree to take the 1st-half of the payments and relegate me to the last half of the payments - that could work.  As much I wish I had a job already, that would buy me another half-year (minimum) to get the job and take care of business.  However, after all of this - would you trust the PEW under just such an arrangement, knowing all she would have to do is turn the receipts in to CSE and all bets are off?


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