About The Psycho Ex Wife
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The Psycho Ex Wife is the true account of a marriage, divorce, and subsequent custody fight between a loving man, his terroristic ex-wife who is strongly suspected of suffering from Borderline Personality Disorder (at least from our armchair psychologist diagnosis), and the husband’s new partner.
We are NOT anti-mother or simply pro-father, we believe all children deserve BOTH parents, unless there are serious issues which prevent one parent from providing a stable, loving environment. An environment where the children are encouraged to love and be loved by both parents.
We offer a view few judges will ever see. For attorneys, custody evaluators, guardians ad-litem, and judges, a custody case ends with their decision. They make a ruling and walk away with nary a care as to how clients can, and do, go against the orders they have handed down. They don’t have to deal with the ongoing parental alienation the children hear as soon as the losing parent goes home, the withheld phone calls due to a parents anger, the hundreds of e-mails, voice-mails and direct confrontations, or false abuse allegations, until of course one party files in court yet again. When a judge gets tired of “frequent filers” (a direct quote from our judge) they now have parenting coordinators to whom they hand off annoying clients. We wish we could hand the psycho ex-wife off, but alas, we can’t. We are stuck dealing with her and so you must suffer with us. (Ha! Just kidding, we have fun, too!) Yes, some of it will have a humorous slant, too.
We hope that by sharing our story, we will effect change in the divorce cartel. We don’t sugarcoat issues, although we do try to protect the innocent. You will read actual e-mails, transcripts, false child abuse charges, and custody evaluations, the result of over $80,000 in legal fees (not including the psycho ex wife’s legal bills) and 4-years of litigation.
We now include or will be offering soon: advice columns (from us and soon - from real experts), workshops, book reviews, tales from the real world (this means you), articles with review & analysis, and more! It is our sincere hope that our ideas, suggestions, and insight will be helpful to you, the ones you love, and who love you as you work your way through your own unique situation. We realize that these issues are not gender-specific and hope you’ll understand that our posts will very often be rooted in our own experiences. With that in mind, we hope you will stick around to the end - a lot of the information we offer is helpful to both genders!
October 21st, 2008 at 7:50 pm
Glad I found you guys..ready to enroll in any typeof crusade vs phsyco ex- wives…dealing with mine for 5 years!….false acussations of sexual abuse(classic0 , visitation cancellations( another classic from the book) etc….Gotta stop this!..America is going downhill because of this epidemic war aginst its man!….gotta rebuild our confidence…it will take at least a generation to get back to balanced court rulings..but we gotta start NOW!!…gotta keep this country being the #1 in the world…do not want to work for chinese!…Seriously , but all my resources are commited to keep my relationship with son , and defending and attacking this phsyco ex!!!
Let’s keep fighting..it is not for us..it is for our children!
October 24th, 2008 at 1:28 pm
here here. I have a leaching and bitter psycho ex girlfriend that I had a child with 1 year ago. With god’s help and my faith the child will be alright. I can’t begin to tell you how much raw emotion, manipulation, bitterness and vindication I have witnessed in the past year. I have been a loving, caring and supportive role model and father figure to her 3 previous born children whose dad never supported them. I have paid her countless monies, been brought under false allegations, and been given limited access to my son. Court ordered paternity instructions that I filed just to see my son are in place. what a joke the judicial system is in our country.She frequently dodges any and all things she wants to, makes situations present where her boyfriend of a few months is in quasi/pseudo control of her and recently stated I couldn’t talk to or see my son, what kind of mother lets this happen? There;’s so much more. I sleep good at night however because my god is bigger than anything she can devise. Takes a lot of energy to dream up the crap she does.
October 24th, 2008 at 8:40 pm
it is really obscene the way courts let this gals do whatever they want…be ready Jay to face , when you are allowed to see your son freely, acussations of molestation, abuse or both!….yes I know God will give each what they deserve , but in the mean time??The glorious day of your son’s childhood are going to fly and never get back!…unless you believe in reencarnation…I do!…..gotta make this a National movement against phsyco ex’s like they are doing in Chile…they are taking this issue to a Congress level….keep fighting and never ever surrender your son…he needs you!
October 31st, 2008 at 4:14 pm
I’m so glad I found this website. It absolutely boils my blood the way my ex-wife treats my husband and his children. I have a daughter from an ex-boyfriend, and I would be DELIGHTED to have him try and be HALF as involved as my husband is with his children. These women have NO IDEA what a real bad father is, or they would thank their lucky stars they didn’t give their children one. They won’t have to explain to their babies why they don’t have a Daddy and why Daddy can’t remember their name or their birthday or what size they are. It makes me sick.
November 1st, 2008 at 11:56 am
WOW!
There are 2 wonderful boys in the middle of all the garbage that ahe throws and it is so unfair what we have to put up with it - but even more unfair what she does to those boys!! The 12S is about at the end of ‘dealing with her’ and may end up here fulltime (they have 50/50) at his request.
I am so glad I found you guys!
I am the other half of someone going through dealing with a PsychSupreme BM ..actually - “his apprentice” as she has called me
Being able to relate? Heck it sounds like you know the Psycho Ex we are dealing with personally LOL.
As I have stated on other ‘places’ on the internet - it is a real mix of emotions finding others stories … while it’s comforting knowing “we aren’t the only ones” it is also disturbing knowing “we aren’t the only ones” lol.
I have bookmarked this site and intend to be back here often.
I am so sorry that you all are going through this but thankyou for sharing.
November 1st, 2008 at 5:19 pm
Nice response from all of you guys and gals….not all men are righteous but neither all women are!..I have been dealing with this situation for 5 years , my son was 4 , now he is 9!! When this whole mess started we used to talk about Thomas and friends , then it was Cars, Madagascar , and NOW it is the Presidential election our topic!…what am I saying ??..time flies and these phsycos do not realize that our kids will grow faster than they think , and they will leave them as soon as they realize how they act…but that really does not satifies me…why ? because in the mean time , life passes and time I have lost with my son will never be back!…we are immortal….for a limited time….now I see at FVC the new generations of kids comming , victims of all this Justice for all mess…in the interest of whom is this all made up??…certainly not the kiddos..that´s BS…it is all in the name of a out of control femminism…look out America…open up your eyes law Makers and Judges…our future as society is at stakes…do something and do it NOW!!…it is not for us fathers..it is for our kids and their future!!
November 2nd, 2008 at 7:11 pm
My husband and I have been separated for a year. Our separation was caused by his affairs and addiction to internet porn. He has always been loose cannon sort of a guy — you never know what he thinks or feels.
Our children are young adults at this point which is wonderful. Easier for everyone.
My husband has never been close to his children. People think that a cheating husband is just cheating on the wife but he is also lying to the children and is absent from the home. I can always remember the year of the first big affair. He missed our holiday picture in 1994.
So now he is seeing a girl (married 2 children) the same age as our oldest child. Instead of telling the kids himself he let them hear about it from friends.
And he blames me because his relationship with the kids is weak. The time to build a relationship with the kids is when they are young. He was always too busy for them. He is always angry and sullen about something.
When we separated I was just so releived — I felt like I had been walking of eggshells for a lifetime. I am so glad that I the children are old enough to see everything clearly for themselves.
November 2nd, 2008 at 10:29 pm
I can sympahtise with a lady like you Kathryn..there are some fathers that….well , you decribed it as you lived it better…however , that does not makes a reference to all men be declared guilty and then have to prove that we are innocent of charges we have ever never commited!…and the worst thing of all is that when you prove your innocence ( like me) , the courts just say…Nothing!…it is like inviting liars and accusers to do it again, and again!!…shame and punishment on those who deal with cheating and iternet porn , but what happen to us that have never done it and are accused of ” probably” doing it????..what happens to our lives , and our mental stability??? not even a sorry we get!!..there is where the problem is!….justice should be all about BALANCE…not leaning towards either side…before the game starts!
November 6th, 2008 at 5:27 pm
I really really think that she is bi polar.. i know some of yall are just kidding, but i seriously think that the ex is… My husband and his ex were seperated for 4 years before getting a divorce 3 years ago.. you would think that she would have gotten over him by now, but she just nit picks on everything that he does… he has 2 amazing daughters and a wonderful son in which I love like my own children. It seems like everyday she calls him up to say yet another thing.. His oldest daughter is going into 6th grade next year-middle school… The elementary that her mother is districted in is great, but the middle school is the worst i have ever seen… the elementary is a magnet school.. and then the middle school has taks grades that are math-52% and science 45%—-thats the average… here lately the oldest has been talking about going to a middle school that her grandmother works at… the psycho told the oldest that she doesnt even know if she is going to be able to go to middle school next year… This would mean that she would have to come live with us– and she wants to– we live an hour away from where they do now… the oldest has ADD and has a difficult time in math, but we have not even recieved her first report card.. how the heck are u goign to tell an 11 year old child that she is not smart enough to pass!!! Father’s should have rights too!!! My husband is the most amazing father— he would do anything for those kids… What are we to do??? any suggestions!!
November 6th, 2008 at 7:45 pm
I would recommend that the older one gets an advocate…she is getting to an age where her voice can be heard!…and must be…gee ,if they ( courts) think fathers are all screwed up, at least children sould be given the benefit of the doubt!…of course she is ADD…what other mean of defense does she have?? it is a a natural reaction to all this stress caused by the bi-polar phsyco!…Thank God that she has you on her and her father´s side…THAT MAKES A HUGE DIFFERENCE !….it will hard for court to pin down dad…now they will have to pin down 2! plus the girl!….God when will they open their eyes!…hope it helps.
Blessings
November 7th, 2008 at 5:45 am
How can an employed father of a toddler intentionally refuse to pay child support for 1+ years, but still say that that child is his 1st priority? The man’s wife of 10 years(who has never ever cheated on him and who was fatihful to her marriage vows) and mother of this child has been financially supporting their child all by herself. Doesn’t “Actions Speak Louder than Words”?
November 7th, 2008 at 7:40 am
They sure do. I don’t know the circumstances surrounding any individual situation (except my own and some others very close to me)… but it certainly could be willful or it could be for some other reason.
November 8th, 2008 at 11:06 am
There are some for sure!…but what about paying full amount , children not getting what they should get , but having to put some more $$ because ex supports somebody on the side , and then on top being acussed of child molestation , so she can get rid of obligations of taking child to visitation??,,there are some on BOTH sides!…not only fathers..that is the point!
November 11th, 2008 at 1:26 pm
I have been with a man for 15 years now who has 4 adult children. Over the years , 2 of the children have told us that their mother was diagnosed as bipolar. They were told they must never tell anyone, and that includes the ex’s new husband. When the ex wife is on meds.. life is blessedly uneventful. When she is off its horrendous. And this has gone on and on for years. The kids now deny that their mother is bipolar and as adults identify with her personally.If Moms bipolar then so am I. Which we have no doubt the possibility exists. Their lives are very secretive, they visit occasionally but don’t share, the relationship has gone from bad to worst to better to ok back to bad - depending on the mindset of their mother at the time. We hear only a portion of the stories, most made up and all based on the view of a mentally ill mother. The worst part is that some of the lies told to the kids about their father have been repeated so often the adult children believe they were witness to it. After many years and an unprovoked attack by the ex my husband tried to talk to his kids about the situation. They lashed out at him and on me. My husband has had enough and is now ready to sever all ties with his children. We have worked so hard for all these years to keep the peace and keep the silence thinking that when the kids became adults they would see the truth… instead.. they have their own version of it whih is not based in reality. They deny ever telling us that she is bipolar and get very upset with us for believing it. They are very ashamed of the diagnosis and are fearful about their mother knowing that they told us. For those of you reading this with similar situations and younger children.. get professional help now. It will not go way, it will not get better on its own. I do not know how to help my husband hang in there.. or if he even should… His self esteem gets innilated with every interaction with his kids and the relationship is very unhealthy.. They accuse him of things and refuse to listen if he tries to offer his opinion. They seem to NEED to believe what they have been told and are not open to listening to him at all. He has tried to call family meetings.. they won’t come.. he has tried one on one conversation that end with the kids angry. He tries to focus the conversation on himself and his kids and they bring up their mothers old and untrue stories for which their is no way to defend without calling their mother a liar which he knows he can’t do. He limits his interaction with them , as they all live far away, and whenever he has interactions with them he is critisized for it. They don’t like his tone of voice, or if he invites them to do something with them, they complain the whole time. When they do visit they sit on the couch and watch tv or sleep the whole time. Children of bi polar parents should be encouraged to get counseling not encouraged to hide it and be ashamed of it. They then grow up into adult children of a bipolar parent and I fear it will be a very lonely existence… everyone that questions their mothers erratic behavior (because they dont know she is bipolar) gets cut out of their lives. They have become very cult like in their us against the world attitude and their complete closed mindedness to hear anything but what their mother tells them. If you are a bi polar parent and reading this.. please get your kids into counseling so they can better understand and function. Anyone who has any advice - please feel free.. we are desperately trying to hold onto some form of relationship with the kids (who all say they love their dad very much) but its become extremely unhealthy for him and I wonder is their ever a time a parent should give up? If you asked me that question 15 years ago I would have said NEVER… but believe me when I say we just don’t know how or what else to try anymore.. I’ve talked him out of severing all ties with his kids so many times and the situation just seems to get worse. Or maybe it seems worse because we have expectations of them as they get older that they are pyschologically unable to meet. Should I butt out and support his decision?
November 15th, 2008 at 4:11 am
I only scanned some of the content on this page, but I must ask: Is this truly how it is on the other side?
I am a 34 yr old mother of 2 who is divorced from the oldest’s father and I have been diagnosed with BPD. I was wondering if there is a group out there for “the psycho ex-wives” to go to, or a place on here that would make it easier for “us” to understand “your” perspectives.
The ex and I had our share of problems and both admit to partial responsibility for the demise of our relationship. However, our daughter was right about 6 when we split and she moved in with her father’s parents and it took 5 years for the divorce to finally be done and over with. It’s been almost a year and a half since the date the divorce became final with my ex-husband getting custody, and our daughter still lives with his parents. I have remarried and have a son now, and the timing seems very very bad, but I have often wondered of the question posted by Ellen: Is there ever a time a parent should give up?
The custody was decided outside the courtroom but took a lawyer for my ex to make a joint decision into a forced command. I knew I needed help and that my life was in turmoil. I also knew that my child needed stability. We decided that since I was having trouble finding and holding a job and wouldn’t be able to support her to the standards she was used to, that I should allow him to have custody and we would have bimonthly visits and no child support.
That’s not what happenned. By the date of the final hearing to dissolve our marriage, I had sought treatment, met someone new, and was quite pregnant and supposed to be on bedrest. I ended up having to take a bus across several states to make it to the hearing and because the divorce and custody matters were taking place in three different places, I had no lawyer. None would represent me and I didn’t have financial backing. He screwed me one more time~in court.
I still haven’t been able to hold a job. I pay child support to him and might get to see my child once a mo. due to distance (and gas prices.) Every trip at this point is made by me and I have to do it all on my own. I am even required to have supervised visitation with a 3rd party of HIS choosing and I have no say in the matter. (btw, that was a mjor event in the breakup of marriage.) My son will be 1 yr old in a few short days, and I have been an excellent mother for him. So why should I still be fighting the visitation and custody issues on my daughter? Is there a point that I should give up? She’s gonna be 13 next summer, and I barely know who she is any more.
I need help and guidance, and I’ve been reaching out for it. But noone seems to be able to guide me on these questions. It’s hard to fight. I despise the conflict. Sometimes I wish I’d never met the ex, but I know that I wouldn’t have a beautiful young woman as my daughter. Or do I? She tells me that she doesn’t want to be my child, or for me to be her mother. How does anyone handle that?
I love my daughter very much. I know I haven’t always been the best, but I have been trying to do better. I believe I’ve succeeded as does my new husband, who my daughter seems not to like. From the sounds of it, the creator of this site has had a bad experiance with his ex and I’m sorry for that, but it’s not just the “healthy” ones that have problems.
November 15th, 2008 at 11:47 am
Jennifer,
You have provided a very unique perspective on this very issue.
This isn’t necessarily how it is on the “other side” for all people who are involved with a BPD. This is only my story. Some have it much worse… some have it much better.
I will shoot you an email and post here in case you come back - a place that may prove very helpful for you.
http://www.bpdrecovery.com
I truly do wish you and your entire family the very best as you work through these issues.
November 17th, 2008 at 2:08 pm
Have a question for you guys….ex phsyco insists on allegations of sexual molestation to my son from me…I will go on and on throgh whatever they might want (CPS; POLICE ,etc) , and nothing will come come out because there is NO MOLESTATION WHATSOEVER EVER!…however i just found out that ex has a “friend” who is answering my son´s phone calls when he is with me…can someone help me to understand if she´s got a boy friend ,why she insists in harming my relationship with my son and try to separate us as much as she can??????
Thanks for any advice !
November 17th, 2008 at 5:45 pm
Fernando, the easy answer is that she’s sick, twisted, bitter, angry… any number of adjectives.
The more difficult answer is the one we can’t give because we don’t know. We’re not her. We don’t understand all of the dynamics that went into creating and then dismantling your relationship.
Some people simply have it in them to do whatever it takes to try and make another person suffer as deeply and for as long as possible. Sometimes - that’s just the answer.
November 17th, 2008 at 8:11 pm
Thanks Mr M….having somebody to help us “understand” really helps!
November 23rd, 2008 at 9:51 am
[...] The Psycho Ex Wife is the true account of a marriage, divorce, and subsequent custody fight between a loving man, his terroristic ex-wife who we suspect suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder (at least from our armchair psychologist diagnosis), and the husband’s new partner. We are not simply anti-mother or pro-father … Read more [...]
November 25th, 2008 at 4:45 pm
I would imagine that I am classified as the psycho ex-wife by of course, my ex and his then married, adulterous assistant. I have been told that the way they justify their relationship to others is to tell them I trapped him (we willingly had 3 children and no I did not climb on myself to get pregnant)and he stayed because of the kids (23 years of marriage). What I don’t get is she was married, having an affair with a married man, with 3 children and he was her supervisor and I am the one that is seen as psycho.
I don’t know why lying is easier than telling the truth. The kids 24, 18, and 14 (all boys) all know what he did and her part in it, however, he lied about how they met and how they knew each other, like I wasn’t in the picture at all to discredit both of them. He is still lying today about stuff he doesn’t need to lie about.
He was with her 4 years, he left 3 years ago and we have been divorced 2 years. To date she is divorced,no longer his assistant and they are living together for a year and has never met his mother. She will have nothing to do with the situation and the boys don’t want to either. He is disappointed in the boys if they do not accept her and do what he wants, controlling oh yes. The use of emotional abuse has run a muck and he fights so hard for acceptance and approval and to no avail. Is he a sociopath? I think so.
What does this tell the kids how to treat women and the lack of respect their father has for their mother and for that matter all women. I don’t get it.
November 25th, 2008 at 6:25 pm
Crystal,
You can only be “classified” as a “psycho ex-wife” based on your actions… not the misguided notions of an ex-spouse who did what you report yours did.
It’s one thing to be labeled something… it’s entirely another to act like that label on a consistent, long-term basis.
I’m certain I’m a psycho ex-husband to the PEW… it doesn’t make it fact.
November 26th, 2008 at 6:09 pm
You are right M….your actions is what classifies you , not the “other”´s perceptions..now, lying is easier because is the root of all evils!! Truth is hell!
December 2nd, 2008 at 2:56 pm
I appreciate the input and I try to constantly think about what Father Frank told me during counseling, the people they tell their lies to and anyone who will listen, unless they are paying your bills, they are not important enough to think about. I sometimes wonder why I do not know why I cannot get at least this through my head. It is painfully clear that I have always seeked approval from others and as stated “other’s perceptions” are important, but to what extent. I know I have to be the bigger person and I try, but when is Karma going to kick in, really, when?
December 4th, 2008 at 3:20 pm
Crystal..that´s the unethical and immoral part of this system…as alec said…who is the one that produces the money for everybody???..the liar!…attorneys, couselors,judges,bailiffs, police inc¿vetigators, CPS,DRO…etc….money, money, money….religion??…thye only care about money!( with few exceptions!)….keep fighting for what you love , there is when this karma is going to kick in!
December 5th, 2008 at 3:58 pm
I have been married to a wonderful man for two years. We both have kids from our previous marriages. I have a good working relationship with my ex, mostly because we are both sane people. My husband has a total wacko for an ex and she, for the last year, has been taking him (us) to court to extend alimony and get more child support. He has paid for 7 years and is totally current. He had paid a few days late here and there so she took him to court for contempt of the divorce decree. He got 30 days jail, suspended unless he (us) are late again. Are you kidding me! The court system has nothing better to do than try to put good people in jail for being a few days late on child support. We are self employed and the money does not flow the way it would if you get a regular pay check but there is no room for us to pay even 1 day late!! Not to mention we have to pay her court costs for all of this. The ex is a paralegal and works 10 hours a week and we pay for all of her other expenses. This system is broken. Mothers, which I am one, do not have the right to ruin families and the courts are allowing this to happen. Where is the simple common sense and fairness?
December 11th, 2008 at 4:09 pm
I typed in to Google “I married a man with a Psycho ex-wife” Believe me I was shocked to see your website come up….happily so. I married my dream husband almost 3 years ago. I got 2 bonus children, whom I absolutely Love & Adore…but with them came a mentally ill psycho ex-wife with Narsisistic personality Disorder, plus a whole lot of other DX’s. We have spent 10’s of thousands of dollars..over the years…we have had/have a restraining order for the past 3 years, which she always fights us on. I could go on forever…but won’t. I will be reading your story here online. PS it feels good to not be alone…Thank you! Linda
December 12th, 2008 at 2:15 pm
regarding net´s case…no wonder gm, chrysler, bank of america,aig , and countless other compenies are going bankrupt…america is nuts trying to put people in jail!..i really would like all those judges and para legals get the economy out of trouble getting a real job and producing something they can sell to the world instead for harming people that is indeed producing!…not all problems in life are solved putting people in jail!! wake up!..before it is too late!..or is it??
December 16th, 2008 at 2:18 am
My husband and I have been together for 5 years and have recently married. He has two beautiful kids G10 and B8. Whilst they can be hard work at times, I get along very well with them. Their mother on the other hand is pure EVIL!! She is actually psycho!!! She suffers from Psychotic Depression… but that’s something the Australian Family Court system doesn’t seem to mind too much about!!
We have spent $50,000.00 so far on litigation… just to get the kids less than half the time. We are always supportive of the kid’s relationship with their mum, but she is awful about us to the kids.
It seems the nicer we are… the nastier she gets. We are at our wits end. Every time we think it’s over… she pops up with some new rubbish to try to argue about.
And apart from fantasising about her getting hit by an anvil (loony tunes style)… there is very little we can do to change things. We just hope that the kids don’t follow in her footsteps.
Good luck everyone!! Looks like we’re not alone!!
December 16th, 2008 at 12:19 pm
This website is GREAT! When I met my husband, it took very little time for me to identify that his ex has BPD (I’m a nurse). But, it’s unbelievable to me that the gardian, counselors, lawyers, and judge not only refuse to address her crazy behaviours …they seem to be on her side most of the time. What would be extremely helpful would be to have some guidelines on dealing with someone with BPD. We have to push for my husband’s PEW to stick to agreements. (I think that is really important for this personality disorder.) When she goes against agreements or doesn’t get her way, she tries to get as many people involved as possible to justify her behaviour..and lies, lies, lies! Of course, it seems all of these “professionals” are more than willing to help her excuse away her bad behaviour. Someone, please have a mental professional post a list of “do’s” and “don’t do’s” on dealing with BPDs!
December 16th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
Heh… I’m dead glad you’ve done this website and all that seems to be in it. I feel sympathy for your story and the plight that it portrays- for save the situation with the child, your story mirrors mine.
Your armchair diagnosis is probably spot-on; I was married for 11 years to a woman who’d had a child. Like daughter like mother- the child self-committed herself for cutting at the age of 18 in one of her more lucid moments and was diagnosed with Bipolar-Affective Disorder AND Borderline Personality Disorder. My ex exhibited the same behaviors over time and met 7 to all 9 of the DSM IV diagnostic criteria. She is to this day, even though we’re divorced, and legally so (She was too off in her own little world to realize she HAD to respond to the Citation in the divorce filing within a given time or she’d default)- she’s still slandering myself and a friend of ours; with things ranging from the friend is dating me/sleeping with me and living in “her” house, I stole her camping gear and renaissance festival costuming (”garb”) and handed it all to the friend, having attempted to rape two women at the campgrounds at one of the festivals, and having illegally divorced her.
It comes as no surprise to see a borderline personality disordered person acting the way you describe- I watched it play out with not just ONE person, but the daughter, the people she brought into our lives as “friends”, and the people that she decided were more fun to have sex with than myself. I’ve watched several dozen of these dramas play out as an eye witness.
People need to know that this stuff DOES happen.
People need to know that the stuff we’ve got as laws are more due to us listening to the insane than there’s a real problem present and someone’s pleading loudly enough because the problem’s real. By the time people realize the person’s “crying wolf”, the action’s been done and the damage has been done.
December 16th, 2008 at 3:21 pm
No wonder the economy is broken!..50K,25K( my case) i´m out!….does not get the job done to get nicer…but neither to fight…kind of in the middle’ should I say??…the kids will realize who is right and who is wacky…but….in the mean time??….the law system is afraid of these BPD´s…..let´s do something before it is too late!
December 17th, 2008 at 5:27 am
[...] The Psycho Ex Wife is the true account of a marriage, divorce, and subsequent custody fight between a loving man, his terroristic ex-wife who we suspect suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder (at least from our armchair psychologist diagnosis), and the husband’s new partner. We are not simply anti-mother or pro-father … Read more [...]
December 17th, 2008 at 10:06 pm
we are pro sanity..that´s it. As simple as that!
December 19th, 2008 at 7:05 pm
the war continues..now she has filled for a PO for my son!…after she was denied several for her…dunno how long can i stay fighting…5 years and counting….how sick can someone be??
December 25th, 2008 at 11:07 am
Happy Holidays!….hope the faith continues to go on and change the biased legal system we live in….blessings to all of you!
December 28th, 2008 at 9:09 am
Wow this is like deja vu! My son and his daughter’s mother went through the same thing this Christmas. It never fails she wins no matter what. Nothing is more frustrating and draining than dealing with narcissistic sociopaths!!!!!
December 28th, 2008 at 8:32 pm
To avoid chmass blues and frustrations, my son and i celebrate chmass all year long!…the only way to get around careless rulings and devious mother strategies…very sad , but we have been left no other way around….that ´s the only way we can get over the endless hurdless put to keep our normal father-son relation!…what a shame…
December 29th, 2008 at 9:02 pm
I was married to my, now ex-wife, for 6 1/2 years straight out of highschool. We had a girl 5 years into the marriage. I had always suspected her to be somewhar “bi-polar” but never gave it much thought. After the baby was born it got incredibly worse. She decided to take the full 12 weeks FMLA which left me with ALL of the bills. Up until that point everything had been split 50/50 (we had the same job) Bills were starting to pile up (and I caught hell for it) and even though I wanted to spend every moment with my new little girl I had to do something. I started taking on as many shifts as I could just to make ends meet. That’s when it all started snowballing to our bitter end. Then, (according to her) I didn’t love her or the baby any more and I was having an affair with every girl on my myspace friends list and every girl at work. (again, supposedly) I eventually got fed up and realized that this wasn’t what I had signed up for and filed for a divorce a year & a 1/2 later. She was putting my job at risk by getting Loss Prevention involved at my work saying I was sleeping with employees she just didn’t know who… and this was after the fact that we were no longer together. I mediated with her divorce lawyer (I had to fire mine) and gave up our home and everything in it. All I wanted was joint custody of my daughter. My ex said that she would say or do anything to keep me from seeing my lil girl and she is still holding true to her word today (almost two years later) She uses her as leverage. She had a “child under 3 provision” put in our divorce decree, and I was only allowed to see my daughter under supervision. I pay $286 a paycheck which is 20% of my paycheck and carry health insurance on my child. She has a lot better paying job than me now and we have joint custody but I feel I’m getting the short end of the stick. Working hourly at a drugstore, that really doesn’t leave much to pay the bills. Now, it’s still like pulling teeth to see my daughter. And when I pick her up or drop her off, she has something to say to me like “don’t paint her nails, don’t do this, don’t do that.” I get to see her twice a week and only when it’s convenient for her. She has since remarried and tells people that my daughter doesn’t need me, that she has already found a replacement. I recently got remarried and I know that’s a big problem for her. She told me that she didn’t want my “now wife” spending too much time with my daughter, etc. etc. And today CPS came to my house to ask me why my 3 year old says “booby”. What the hell?!?!? ANYBODY! DOES IT EVER GET BETTER? Somebody had told me once that it might have gone better if I HAD cheated on her, that way there would have been a basis for her actions…
Sorry for the ranting. She’s done a hell of a lot more to me and my wife. I just needed to get some of it off of my chest…
All Psycho Ex-Wives Are Precocious Succubi Sent From The Depths Of Hell To Gnaw On The Souls Of Men!
January 1st, 2009 at 11:32 am
Michael , it is amaiing how , with very minor differences( boy vs girl , 3 vs 4 years old, lenght of marriage) but the coincidences are just unbeliavable!…there is got to be something in the air( or spiritual world) that has contaminated the spirits and souls of these ladies!!…the want to vanish ex hubbies from their lives no matter what!…now they are allowed by cps, dro´s,judges etc to get away with those accusations!….of course would have been better to cheat on that person..probablly she would have been satisfied on her devious desires…dont know…now , my question is…how long would it take her to do the same to the replacement(?) that she did to you??…nad how are you going to be able to keep and develop your relationship with your daughter????????? which at the end end is the only thing that really matters???
January 1st, 2009 at 2:43 pm
I have a question.. not sure if anyone knows the answer. My boyfriend (fiancee’) and I are having to deal with his psycho soon to be ex. He had me listen in on their phone calls where is says one minute that she wants him to step up and be a man and be responsible when it comes to the kids. He offers all the time to pick the kids up, gives her money for them, asks to spend time with them.. but she refuses and says she doesn’t want his help. She goes back and forth all the time. Now she is saying that she won’t let him have visitation because she doesn’t want ME to ever set eyes on “HER” kids. Can she legally do that?? I don’t think she can refuse him visitation, but can she have it written so that I am not to be in the house when the kids come over to visit even though it is my house?? By the way they live in NY. Anyone know the answer??
January 1st, 2009 at 6:18 pm
Michelle, while I have seen it, in rare instances, occur from time to time, in each case the couple was unmarried. Again, VERY rare. Does he have a legal, court-approved custodial arrangement with the ex? Reality is, during his custodial time, she has no control over who/where he and the children choose to spend their time together.
January 2nd, 2009 at 5:58 pm
I’m in the same boat it appears. I brought a birthday card from my boyfriend to his son and since today is his birthday, I thought I’d give it right to his mother. I asked at the ** if she was working and he went back to look and out she came! That shocked me. I told her hehad given me the card to mail but since it was her son’s birthday today, he might like it today. Then I left.
She immediately called his mother and said that she was told by his family that we were engaged and there’s no way in hell Ian will ever see the card and she had ripped it into little shreds. She also said she asked me if I was one of his crack girlfriends and I told her I was an addict in recovery. LIES all of it. I was warned, but couldn’t possibly believe someone would do this to their own child. Oh well. It wasn’t like I looked beautiful or anything, my nose and lips were all red from blowing my nose so much and I have NO makeup on.
Ugh. Good to know I’m not alone.
I’m wondering if I should EVER marry this guy when he’s got this kind of ex.
January 7th, 2009 at 10:43 am
Phsyco x´s are so wicked and twisted that whatever they do is right( boyfriends, lying,cheating,abusing children) and no matter what ex hubbie does is WRONG…if they do not find anything wrong…bingo..they create situations that will at least cause lost time of “visitation”( I really hate that word…the non-custodila becomes a visitor , no more, in our chldren´s lives!…so this a matter of control….just that…”I want to control your life, through the children”…..and they do!!
January 22nd, 2009 at 2:08 pm
I have to reply to Michelle and Hoosier gal(and any other stepmom or soon to be out there) - I am in the same situation (or at least very similar). I married my wonderful husband 5 1/2 years ago knowing when I met him he was going through a messy divorce and that his ex was mean but had no idea what was coming! We have been in court every year for 6 years (counting before I was there - and 2008 was the first year without court or legal papers of any kind, only threats from her that led nowhere because she finally realizes she really doesn’t have a leg to stand on and if we do go to court, because of the way she has lived her life since the last time we were in court, she won’t end up with what she wants and really stands to lose more - but, that doesn’t keep her from trying to force us to do her will by demanding something and trying to start an argument and see if that will work). From reading this site I realize I have alot to be thankful for even though dealing with her as often as we have had to (which has gone in spurts and is always AWFUL!!) has finally taken a toll on my health, I realize from these posts it could actually be alot worse!! She is the most selfish, hateful woman I have ever met - but she has never stooped to lying about my hubbie or me, although that may only be because everyone in this community and all of her family know him and she knows they would never believe her! The worst she has done in that department is to project her own behaviors onto us (the twisted thing is that she actually believes it happened that way - when she says it or thinks it it becomes the truth to her and she’ll argue it to her last breath). She has been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder - and anyone dealing with a person with BPD realizes there is no reasoning with them. We are blessed that she at least has the self standards to keep herself out of drugs but she jumps from man to man and house to house like it’s nothing - all the while dragging my 7y/o ss with her. She has never thought twice about yelling and cussing my hubbie out in front of their son and whatever she is mad about generally comes out of nowhere and is nothing to anyone else but her (and usually it hasn’t even happened but she assumes we will do something like she would do it and so gets pissed based on that assumption.). And, we know she has tried to coach ss on how to feel about us and to not want to come to our house and that she doesn’t hide how she feels about us at all (it’s hard for us to do that sometimes but we try very hard not to let him see how we feel or the problems she creates) My husband swears he could kill her with his bear hands after dealing with her for 10 years now (and I do believe he could since no one has ever made me feel so ANGRY as she can, and bitter for the things she has gotten away with that the court didn’t understand, and I daydream about fiery crashes or a call telling us one of her suicide attempts meant to get sympathy and her way has actually done the job!), the only thing that keeps him from it is knowing he’ll have to face God with blood on his hands - not that we obsess over her or this situation, most of the time we are able to forget she exists and it’s alot easier now that she has moved 2 hours away. Anyway, I wanted to say to the girls that there is hope and it is ALL worth it. The kids of those kind of women are bound for a life of instability and anxiety and their only hope is to have all the stability and unconditional love and rational examples of how to live while they are with the other parent. And, you CAN seperate your life with your husband from the life you both have in dealing with the evil ones. My husband and I have a great relationship, we’re happy, our kids (we have a 5y/o son together) are happy and know they are loved. My ss knows that his mom is the instigator in what drama comes up and he is beginning to not want her to come to his events or to even tell her about them (too bad the courts won’t agree). We fought for years - they had 50/50 with very frequent fighting and incidents of attempted control and emotional upheaval, then she up and moved to try and keep me away from his school/teacher (I was only dropping off papers at his preschool). It backfired on her terribly. She rushed into a marriage to make it look like that’s why she moved but she still lost custody (still has joint, darn it), he lives with us and visits her e/o w.e. and some time in the summers. We got it court ordered that she stay in therapy with her current therapist and the most important thing we got court ordered (I believe) is that ALL communication MUST be done via email!! That has saved so many verbal attacks and allowed us to have everything documented and forced her to be reasonable even when she didn’t want to so that she didn’t look bad. It is the number one thing I attribute to the peace we have most days now (besides the fact that if these people have enough rope they will hang themselves over and over again). She has tried several times to go around that order but we ignored/walked away from her or simply said “email” and walked away and then as soon as we got home we sent an email documenting in a calm,factual way what had happened and what she had said and reminded her what the court order said. She hated it but has since at least gotten used to it and likes to think she’s smart enought to catch us up in something but never can because we are very careful to be writing every email as if the judge is going to be reading it…there’s a good chance that someday she might. Anyway - if the man is worth it then it’s all worth it - we know the kids are worth it and we are their only hope for a happy, well adjusted life!! Just make sure you have a way to release stress (exercise works for me, and venting by writing), and that you do not allow yourself to dwell on that person or what they have done/may do past having documented it, when you are done writing that episode is over, that person no longer exists until the next thing you need to document, or after you step out of the courtroom take a breath no matter how it went, talk it over with your attorney and know that just by having gone to court you have laid another brick in the road - you have your wonderful life and family to go enjoy - tell yourself it doesn’t matter what they do or say they can’t touch you, your family, your life or your peace and joy. At least these are the things that have worked for me - and I realize our case has gone better (which I attribute to the power of prayer and faith which allowed God to work on our behalf)than some have because some do have bad judges, but you can only control what you can control and the rest has to be let go and moved on from for your own health and sanity. Parents have rights up until the courts take them away and if you still have joing custody no one can tell you you can’t see that child or what to do when you have them - whatever teh PEW says is just wind blowing (just make sure whatever you do won’t get the kid in trouble when they get back to the evil one if possible since they have no problem using them - but write it down if your kid tells you they got reemed and send an email on the issue to the ex letting her know you know and it won’t be tolerated). Sorry, this has gotten incredibly long and so I will sign off with one more thought for what has helped us immensely - DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. I send ourselves emails and keep them in the same file as all the ones between us and her, that way it is time and date stamped. It’s a good place to vent as well. Our next step, if she forces our hand and files a petition for something will be to bring in an expert witness to inform the judge on what BPD is and how it is virtually impossible to share custody positively with those people. My goal in writing was to offer those ladies, and anyone else, some hope in these situations - it may take awhile and it may get worse before it gets better, and it may never get better (depending on the judge) but it will always be worth it because at least you can say you did everything you could to protect them and will continue to until they turn 18…they may never understand your sacrifice or thank you for it but you’ll KNOW you did/are doing the right thing and all you can for them. Good luck to everyone and may God bless the kids in the middle!!
January 24th, 2009 at 11:20 pm
Hello! This is a great site and a great comfort for people like me to know that I am not alone. I am the wife of an amazing, loving husband and have two bonus-kids, both young boys. My husband’s ex is a complete lunatic and has done everything in her power to get revenge on both me and her ex. She wavers on who she focuses her anger on and in general I am her target. My husband was one of my best friends and I was secretly in love with him while he was with his ex (whom he never married), but I respected that he had a girlfriend and so never, ever crossed a line and kept my feelings completely hidden. Well, my husband was secretly falling in love with me as well and this was compounded by the fact that he was completely miserable with his ex and only staying with her for the sake of their two kids. She had gotten pregnant against his wishes both times (he left her, but shared custody of his first son, and was separated from her for about six years). When he agreed to try again with her, very clearly and honestly for the sake of their son, he made her promise that she would take birth control (which he paid for) and she lied to him and immediately became pregnant again. He felt too depressed and trapped to leave her at the time and felt like he was just living for his sons and putting up with her until they were older and understood the situation and he could leave and not devastate them at a young age. His ex constantly lied to him, hid a promiscuous past that put him at risk for stds, and was just a bad match for him. He comes from a really nice, great, loving family and she comes from a scary, dysfunctional family that can only be described as white trash. Two of her siblings have/had heroin problems and she allowed the children to be babysat by them, knowing they had drug problems (my husband did not know about this at the time). She is really stupid and uneducated and after trapping him with her pregnancies she completely let herself go and became overweight and wears clothes that would be rejected from Goodwill. She is a slob and spills food on herself and doesn’t notice. Her house is filthy and she doesn’t ensure that the kids take regular baths, brush their teeth, get haircuts, etc…She herself is completely disgusting (and happens to be remarkably ugly) and she models a total lack of self-care for the kids. She feeds them junk food, encourages their temper tantrums and gives them whatever they want. Both kids are good kids, but both have severe behavioral problems due to her horrible parenting. This was the main reason my husband left her (in addition to being repulsed by her mentally, emotionally and physically). He wanted to give the kids a stable home and work with them on becoming happy and emotionally stable and well-behaved. They have improved by leaps and bounds by the love and structure that they have in our home, but we still constantly have to fight against her negative influence. Instead of spending time with her kids, she puts them in front of the tv and lets them play endless video games. The other day, the oldest told us that he estimated that he had played 8 hours of games in a row. She doesn’t want them to read and sees that as my “evil” influence because I told her that I want them to be well educated and go to college someday if they want to. She is intimidated by me and thinks anything I do, even if it is positive, is evil and an attempt to steal her children’s love from her. She is psychotic when it comes to the kids and clearly uses them as pawns to try to hurt my husband and to lash out at me as their step-mom. They really like me and that sticks in her craw worse than anything. Other than the kids, when my husband left her, she refused to believe it and even though he explained that he was leaving her regardless of his new relationship with me working out or not, she was in complete denial and called me a “filthy home-wrecker” among more abusive and nasty names. She accused my of “seducing” her husband even though are getting together involved a mutual confession of feelings (initiated by him AFTER he had broken up with her). We had a long serious talk about our future and the implications of our decision on the kids and she accused us and me specifically as destroying her whole life and ruining her kids lives forever. She went completely nuts and tried to make “rules” such as the kids couldn’t meet me for three months. She was very unstable and my compassionate husband did everything he could and spent hours letting her rant about us, hoping she would get all her anger out. She did tons of illegal things that constituted harassment and I almost got a restraining order. She saw none of her behavior as wrong because she felt that I “stole her man” and therefore she could be as horrible to me as she wanted and be justified. When we got engaged, she had people spying on my myspace page on the internet and found out that way and called my husband, screaming and threatening to tell me that she had tried to seduce him recently. She’s so crazy that she didn’t realize that I knew about her seduction (pathetic and gross) attempts and that it just made her look crazy, degraded and pathetic and had no reflection on my husband (who handled it as well as he could). When we got married, she seemed in shock, but told us that we were getting married just to hurt her (narcissistic personality disorder maybe?) and has continued throughout our happy marriage to predict our divorce and tell her “friends” that he will come back to her some day. She is completely obsessed with him even though she showed no signs of it during their relationship. She confessed after their breakup that she had “just known” from the first unplanned pregnancy that they were meant to be together forever and than nothing could keep them apart. She didn’t tell him this during their six year separation and only told him this after he finally left her for good and married another woman. She used the kids and custody classically to get revenge and fortunately we got 50/50 so that little revenge plan didn’t work. She really has nothing left except nasty comments and we are beginning to think they are funny. She is still completely insane and we believe that she has borderline personality disorder among others, but our lives are happy and stable and it does get better. If you have a good husband that can set clear boundaries and keep them and puts your marriage first that you will have stress, but make it. We are extremely happy despite the craziness and planning on having our own child when the kids are older. Anyway, that’s my story in a nutshell and I just wanted to give encouragement and support to the other woman who are experiencing similar things. Stand up for yourself, put your marriage/relationship and the kids first and don’t let the crazy ex get to you. They are pathetic, angry and alone and they just want to hurt others and get attention. The best thing you can do is ignore the nasty insults and behaviors and follow court processes for serious transgressions or anything that endangers the kids or you or your husband. Good luck out there!! Keep up your spirits because it does get better!
January 29th, 2009 at 3:44 pm
I appreciate this website. I know that my hubby and I aren’t alone in dealing with his ex-wife. But, sometimes you tend to forget that. His ex-wife has done everything from following us around town, driving past our house, sitting on the other side of the fence at my hubby’s parents house just to watch us with the kids, to getting on her knees and telling their children that she is one of my children and teaching them to beat up my kids. She’s very scary. She mentally abuses their four boys to extremes you wouldn’t believe. The problem is they bring it to our house and into my kids lives. At one point I was afraid to leave his kids with mine b/c she has told her kids to beat mine up, so the boys tell us and we confronted her and she said she did do this. Now, she’s trying to convince them one at a time that they have a mental disorder. The oldest she told him that he has a learning disability and needs help, the second to oldest she’s told him he has a mental disorder and it’s ok that when he’s violent, the third she’s told the school he has ADD, and the baby she just tells him he should hate us. She has taken it as far as telling the school that the kids have something wrong and had all this testing done just for the schools to tell her they don’t see anything wrong with these children. We just tell them there is nothing wrong with any of them regardless of what their mother tells them. Other than that we don’t talk about her at all. We leave her out of all discussions. But, this is putting a strain on our marriage. I have a daughter who has recently become very ill and has had 2 week hospital stays and multiple dr visits and I just can’t handle his ex-wifes crap right now. Any suggestions on how to keep her crap that she does to his kids from effecting us right now? We are very encouraging to the boys and would never be anything but. Is it wrong to ask them to keep mom’s issues at her house unless there is something wrong or bad going on? We just don’t want to hear it anymore. My hubby has fought for his kids with the school’s and they told him as long as one parent agrees to what they want to do then they don’t need him. And she keeps moving them from school to school b/c the school’s are figuring her out. She’s asked to move out of the county so she can move them to yet another school and he told her no. His oldest hasn’t been in the same school twice yet and he’s in fourth grade. Trying to keep my spirits up but not seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.
February 9th, 2009 at 3:12 am
[...] The Psycho Ex Wife is the true account of a marriage, divorce, and subsequent custody fight between a loving man, his terroristic ex-wife who we suspect suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder (at least from our armchair psychologist diagnosis), and the husband’s new partner. We are not simply anti-mother or pro-father … Read more [...]
February 9th, 2009 at 7:07 pm
My godson just divorced the “tart without a heart” last week. She has denied him access to his children, ran up his credit cards and had child protective services visit him and his new girlfriend today.
It boggles my mind that a woman could go so far as to literally quit work to devote so much time keeping a father from visiting his kids when so many men would just say: “to hell with it. I’ll just have to wait until the kids are of age.”
I am a woman and do not understand where these women get off doing that? I wish that I could help him but I live in another state halfway across this country and cannot fund him with an attorney.
At some point he must have been worth something to the beastie thing because she risked her life twice to bear his children. If he was so terrible she would not have gotten pregnant over six years apart.
Has anyone won joint custody in a situation like this?In southern Cali?
February 13th, 2009 at 12:57 am
My husband’s ex-wife is the craziest PSYCHO on earth. She NEVER sleeps with her EVIL, manipulations, and psychotic agenda with their child as a weapon. It is sickening. And, while I love my step-daughter, I can’t help but feel if it wasn’t for her my marriage would be wonderful. Our quality of life suffers, going thru constant torture. It’s a horror I would not wish on anyone. I do hold resentment, and at times (though I know the child is innocent) I can not interact with his daughter with a pure heart, happily of freely. I am sure the chidl can sense the sadness and possibly the wall I sometimes put up. The child knows her mother is crazy. The Courts support the mother at all costs. The only time these psycho exes meet justice is only after they have murdered the husband and his new wife. Then, all of a sudden, the signs of obsessiveness and all the stalking is truly addressed. We have no right to peace or a life….she’s got that child and that is all that matters to the Courts…To Hell with all others.
February 16th, 2009 at 12:22 am
I really think I must take the prize, my husband was married to the queen of the psychos, and Im starting to wonder if hes caught some of it!!!!!
Ours is the stuff movies are made of, infact we often joke about one day there being a movie made about this case and have even discussed who will play each of us. (Cathrine Zita-Jones for myself and I think Steve Martin, or sean connery for my husband and Courtney Love for the Psycho!!! or though my husband is not happy about steve martin.Ha ha….. oh well you have to be able to laugh sometimes don’t you?
Im afraid this story is really twisted but involves, sex, lies, a prostitute, a boyfriend that has been in the psyciatric hospital as a pediphile, four tries at laying sexual abuse charges, attempts to lay psychological abuse charges, cases being throwen out of court, cases not getting to court etc…. etc……etc…..Over $400,000 in legal fees, a ruling by the human rights commision in geneva, and still no access to children and its still going.
February 16th, 2009 at 7:03 am
Sean and Courtney married when she was 21 and he was in his late fourties. She moved into the home that he had inherited from his father. The bussiness his father had started, that he now runs is situated on this property. They were together 16 years.In 2000 they were experiencing problems, Courtney was going out all nightand not returning until after 4am several times a week, leaving Sean to look after the children. This led to arguments and harsh words coming to a head. One morning when Courtney arrived home at 5.30am they argued and out of frustration Sean threw a water glass into the fireplace smashing it. Courtney used this incident to take out an interim protection order against Sean but continued to live in the home with sean and the children for a further three months. She then announced that she needed some “space” to “sort herself out”,and that they would go out for family outings etc… Sean bought her a brand new microwave, washing machine etc…. As well as her taking all furniture etc..that she wanted eg tv,beds,sterio,video etc…On top of this she asked if he could see it in his heart to continue paying her her weekly allowance until her welfare payments came through. She had been recieving this from him for the whole sixteen years they had been together.(Shes never had a job in her life)All this he did thinking they could work through what ever problems they might have and would get back together. Mean while he was turning to his best friend Dick for advice and support.Dick was having problems of his own financially and couldnt afford to register or warrant his car etc…so Sean offered to pay these for him to help him get back on his feet.During this time Courtney would return to the house when Sean was known to be out and removed all the family videos and photos including the ones of Seans parents,grandparents etc… She then went to his office and removed all the negatives as well as taking the car registration papers which she later changed into her name and sold. Well you guessed it, Courtney had left to be with Dick, Dick had been giving Sean all the advice under the sun about not going to lawyers etc.. by this time the protection order was past the time of appeal, she had moved out and thats when all of the bills started arriving. It turns out that in the last month before she moved out she and dick had been using the orderbooks from Seans family business to stockpile groceries, furnishings, petrol vouchers etc……She then stopped Sean from having any access to the children unless Dick supervised the visits. When Sean protested about this his lawyer said..”well if you don’t agree to this you won’t get to see your children before christmas”, so he accepted it. Dick supervised the visit in a provocotive manner and constantly tried to bait Sean with comments, luckily Sean is a gentle giant and didn’t raise to the bait.(I don’t know how he managed this) at the end of the visit Dick told him that Courtney said he was only aloud to give the children one christmas gift each.But that he,Dick would see to it that the children got the rest of the gifts at christmas. Courtney continued to resist any other person except Dick to supervise the visits between Sean and the children this was especially heart wrenching to Sean as this was the person sleeping with his wife. Sean decides to take a small pocket tape recorder to tape Dicks comments to prove Dick was being provocative. This is evident on the tape but what is puzzeling is one of the children calling Sean “poppa” he says “what did you call me?” they say “thats what mum and Dick said we have to call you” This becomes important later on as in four years the children will refer to their dad as Mr Connery and will nolonger be calling him Dad.(they had always called him Dad, and this is only four months since they split up.)Finally Sean gets neutral supervised access organised through Barnardos. He gets one visit. This is when I meet him and we start being seen around town together. When he goes for his next visit she cancels it saying
they are going away for a holiday, then when the next one is due one of the kids is sick, then theres another excuse, then he gets one visit but hes not aloud to talk about what the kids do at home, what they do at school etc….. Then she acuses him of whispering to one of the little boys.Sean is a very softly spoken man,and as it turns out the boy has glue ear and needs gromits, which she decides not to get and that she will treat the problem herself.Finally Seans Lawyer says if she tries to obstruct the next visit the police will be called.the day before the visit the police turn up at Seans company and arrest him as Courtney has made a statement that one of the children has confided to Dick that Sean has sexually abused them. Of course all visits stop, Sean is interviewed, Courtney and children are interviewed, children see psychologist. After nearly a year the Police say they are not laying any charges, there is nothing to lay charges for!! Just when visits are due to be resumed, within weeks… “oh the child has remembered more” another year….children are interviewed again, children are examined internally, police come back with a letter to say there is no evidence of sexual abuse and that there will not be any charges layed…yep she even tries this whole thing a third time and yes it stalls visits again.And no the police never lay any charges. Meanwhile Dick and courtney are putting those children through hell, they are putting the kids in the car and at times driving for up to an hour to be in places they know Sean will be at a certain time (he goes to the same church every week and has been going there for elevin years) and then ringing the police to try to lay breach of protection orders. They tried this FIVE different times in five different locations and only one ever got to court and then the judge dismissed it.They have tried psycological abuse (that was throwen out of court) They have tried breaking the family trust (this is for the bussiness that Seans dad started 55years ago that Sean inherited) The business has been audited this didn’t get them anywhere. We are still getting regular prank phone calls. Our friends are getting the same prank phone calls. One of our friends is a school teacher and someone rang up and left an anonamous call that did they realise that they had a pediphile at their school!! Sorry Ive been raving here but its just so frustrating and THIS IS ONLY THE BEGINNING, you wouldn’t believe how these two have evolved. I think of them as a virus that keeps mutating and every time they get knocked back they just figure out how the system works and tries another tact. This has been going on for over eight years, Dick is collecting a sickness benefit and Courtney is on a sole parents benefit, getting legal aid for all her legal fees so can continue bringing litigation while Sean has to pay to defend himself against these constant allergations.He has spent over $400,000 dollars so far in legal costs and its still going.Sean says that the legal system is wrong and he feels sorry for all those dads out there that can’t fight for what is right and have to give up fighting because they can’t afford too. He has even taken his fight to the human rights commission in geneva and won!!! But thats all in the rest of the story as I said you wouldn’t believe it.The good bit is, even though we didn’t buy groceries this week as we can’t afford too with all the latest legal bills we have the most fabulous vegi garden that we spend our weekends in and this weekend Sean has spent it building me a small green house for valentines day.
February 16th, 2009 at 5:40 pm
I just want to comment on something Stepmom has said:
“These women have NO IDEA what a real bad father is, or they would thank their lucky stars they didn’t give their children one”
Agreed! Most of the stories we hear in the media are unfortunately stories of dead-beat fathers. So many divorced men take very good care of their children, often taking up brunt of the care, while their ex-s complain and sit on their asses or trying to undermine these men’s lives. I see this every day with my boyfriend. She pushes her daughter every opportunity she gets, she claims that she cannot take or pick up her daughter from school because she had to work late, yet she tells my bf at every opportunity she gets to what a bad father he is. He takes care of her 90% of the time, the mother has the daughter on the weekend, so she does not do any of the dirty work. She just goes shopping with her daughter and to the zoo. Well, it’s easy to do when you don’t do anything else. She doesn’t even cook.
I see it other places. I used to work with a guy who raised his daughter on his own becasue the mother was a junky.
February 17th, 2009 at 3:01 am
Response to Angelia, it does happen in southern cali. My husband has sole custody of his three children. It’s expensive, time consuming, exhausting, and emotionally draining. Sometimes it hard not to blame the men for choosing such evil women. The best advice i was given is document everything, letters, e-mails, phone calls, money exchanged, everything. These women believe they have the upper hand and they really act with entitlement and righteousness. They are their own worst enemy. Try not to let it consume you, this battle and the ex has been a thorn in my side for over 10 years.
February 17th, 2009 at 4:31 pm
Just found this site — WOW. Same thing, slightly different cast of characters, only 1 kid (13yo), never married, more money (I’m well into 6 figures now).
After dealing with my own PEW (Girlfriend, “PEG” in my case) for 13 years, the experts are finally all aligned. Minor’s Counsel, Therapist, and Mediator have each filed reports recommending sole legal to me and supervised visits only for PEW until she enters and progresses in therapy. When the report from Minor’s Counsel came out, it was scathing. I was practically moved to tears reading it. They finally GET IT!
The custody hearing, which has been continued repeatedly for nearly 2 years, was scheduled for this past Friday. Family members flew across country to witness the proceeding. Two hours before the hearing, we get a phone call and learn from my attorney that the judge was rushed to the hospital with chest pains that morning. My first thought was “how did she manipulate the judge into a heart attack?”
Now we have to wait until April. Sigh.
Thankfully, the judge transferred primary physical to me on a temporary basis a few months ago. At least our daughter is somewhat removed from the toxicity of BPD exposure.
I am so excited I found this blog — so much reading to do!
February 17th, 2009 at 6:19 pm
I googled restraining order against spouse ex’s gf, and found this site.
My husband and I have been married for 6yrs. We share a 2 year old, and he also has an autistic child from his previous relationship, they were never married.
The PEW im dealing with is over the top psycho! Before my husband and I were married, her and a friend of hers attacked me, i ended up getting 11 stiches just above my left eye. Lately i’ve really been regretting not pressing charges against her, maybe if i did none of this would be happen till this day. We’ve literally gone back to court every single year since getting married because the ex is never happy with the court order. Theres always something she’s unhappy about or simply just wants to manipulate. Lately i’ve had enough that i’ve started to be a mean person too and not just the supportive wife to my husband. What kind of a wife am i to stand back and let this biatch cause an extreme amount of anxiety and stress to my husband. PEW has asked me countless times to meet up alone, and i’ve declined all invitations. I have even begged her countless times over the years to leave us alone & to limit her contact with me and my husband. I love my husband, i’ve stood by him despite how hard its been for me. But now i worry what it will do to our daughter, will she have to grow up being in this environment to have her brother’s mother constantly causing our family greif. It makes me so sick to see this PEW hug and kiss my daughter when she see’s her. She’s fake and full of evil. And i have no clue where she thougth she was comfortable enough to even get close to my daughter. She doesnt do it infront of me, but im told she does when she see’s my daughter at my mother inlaw’s house.
Im happy to have found this site, im tired of feeling like no one else understand the kind of life my husband and i are living. I hope one day PEW will move on to a new obsession and leave us alone.
For anyone that knows. I was attacked by the PEW 7years ago, i have also called the Police a couple weeks before our wedding because i was sent an ananoymous email saying it would rain blood on our wedding day. When police went to her house she denied everything. And nothing really came out of it besides the ananoymous emails stopped. Is it too late to use this to file a restraining order against her? The more we ignore the more pushy and angry she gets, that as much as i hate to admit this, i am terrified of her. DO we have to have a good physical evidence to file a restraining order?
I just want PEW to leave us alone and understand that just because my husband and i have a relationship with her son does not mean we owe her anything or need to have a relationship with her too.
February 17th, 2009 at 9:10 pm
Fed up, I know how you feel. I have to say I don’t like going into town by myself incase I run into the PEW in our lives. Infact I have just seen my husbands PEW an hour ago while going in to pay an account.
There was no parking space infront of our post office so I hung a right around the corner into a side street….still no parks so went right into the next street thinking if I get a park in this street I’ll just walk through that ally back to the main road and then I saw one, “sweet theres a park” I indicated and swung straight in feeling that sense of achievement at finaly getting one (as you do). Well blow me if shes walking right past that park as I pulled in. I honestly wasnt looking at the people on the foot path I was looking for a park so got quite a shock to see her there. She just shot me with one of those evil death ray looks of hers.Theres nothing quite like that initial feeling of sickness and fear that overwhelms me, my hands shake and my palms sweat when I see her.I know its irrational as she has not hurt me physically, but in the past she has yelled and screamed and verbally abused me, including outside my husbands church and also once in a local charity shop. But its the the amount of financial devastation she causes thats harder to cope with. She will go home now and write up some kind of twisted version of what she thinks happened with all her fabrications added in and then its her word against mine. (she gets legal aid, we don’t) As I said before she is such a psycho she thinks if she sees anyone known to my husband they are obviously stalking her and she goes and tries to lay charges against HIM!!!! Sometimes I wonder if its all worth it, I wouldn’t recommend this situation to anyone. Maybe I’m the psycho one for putting up with all this crap. My dh often comments that its not her, its her dead beat boyfriend brainwashing her into doing all these terrible things. (One time he even said he thinks shes been hypnotised!!!!) NO YOU FOOL ITS HER BECAUSE SHE HATES YOUR GUTS!!!! Of course I don’t actually say that.But it makes my blood boil. Im sick of being nice about it.
February 27th, 2009 at 2:46 pm
Has anyone had experince with the bf’s PEW who wanted withold the child until she did a home inspection? In fact she kept demanding to see our house and refused to let the child stay over until she did. She had no court order or anything like that. She pulled that once, when we moved in together, my bf showed her the house and the child new room. She saw that we just got a new bed for the child and she immediately started demanding that my bf buys a new bed for the child at her house too. Among other things. My bf takes care of the child about 95% the time. He takes her and picks her up from school, makes her dinner etc…then drives her to her mothers house. The mother never picks her up or takes her to school. She does not feed dinner to her. She is a negligent and emotionally disturbed individual who should be taking her psych meds. She refuses to go to therapy. She controls and manipulates the child, yet she has already lost control over her. The child hes no respect for her. They have screaming fits.
Two years later we moved again and she demanded an “inspection”. I put my feet down and told that I do not want that toxic PEW anywhere near our house. She had no legal grounds, she just wanted to stick her nose into our business. It is one thing to be civil, which I have tried very hard from the beginning, but all she wants to do is revenge and blame. In a normal situtation, I think I would have no problem letting the bio mother come and visit on limited basis, but she is not a normal person by far.
March 1st, 2009 at 1:47 am
Its ironic and depressing to read so many many posts about PEW’s. My live-in mate of 10 years(we are not married; he will never do that again) has one - and we’ve been dealing with her for 10 years. I don’t even have to repeat all she’s done - I simply can point to the many emails in here and say ‘ditto’. From breaking in to our house and attacking us, to stealing over $80k from his business account before we could close it, to physically abusing his son by beating with a wooden spoon, making both his son and daughter read books that corporate punishment is showing love; to calling the cops on him during his visitation weekends to say he is kidnapping them and taking them out of the country, and on and on and on.l Yet, the court system and social services continues to let this b**** have custody.
The kids are so mentally messed up, they don’t know what is up or down. They come over like “PEW secret agents”, reporting everything back to her when they visit (she sits them down and interrogates them after they get home), so she can twist events and poison them against him.
He can’t see his daughter any more because the sicko narcissictic, walking personality disorder PEW went and ininusated to social services that he was sexually abusing his daugheter - false, but that pretty much did it for him. End of seeing his daughter. As he put it….he’d sacrifice his soul for his child, but not so that some vindictive miseralbe f’ed up woman can get some sick joillies out of it. So now he only see’s his son - yet the mind-games continue.
The court systems are horrid; there is no advocate for the children. We had a mediator/visitation expeditor for awhile - who actually sided with the PEW!! Well, that is until she finally after almost a year of begging, spoke with and found out about the sick insinuations the ex was doing to the father. Yet, even then the expeditor didn’t recommend anything to the court, just washed her hands of it all.
She slept with her lawyer (yep, we’ve got proof) on/off for 4 years for “services” and dragged us to court constantly, every year, 6-9 months every single year dealing with that all. Now she found someone online, moved over 50 miles away, and picked up and moved in with him in the courts of 3 months. Pulled the kids out of school and gave zero notice to them, then told us via email a week after she moved.
We went to their schools, only to find out that the b***** had put her new boyfriend’s name as the 2nd emergency contact, and did not put the father’s name anywhere. Last month, that same boyfriend who the kids barely knew for a month before they were up and amoved - decided to physically push around his son and has been intimidating him ever sense.
The kicker - she’s manipulated, emotionally abused, and physically abused both children. So neither has a backbone to stand up in court on it - they are petrified and just are not mature or emotionally strong enough to stand up in court. Without that, we’ll never win anything in court.
So to that earlier blogger who said ‘he is giving up’. I feel for you and your hubby - my man has gotten there. He will not see his daughter at all, until she is grown and away from her mother’s sick control. He is almost in the same place with the son - the kid is so wrapped up in the lies and manipulation done by his mother, that he is starting to do the same sick behaviors.
So, now 12 years into this; 10 of which I’ve been with him….we have cut all communication with the ex except emails and only related to visitation. Her move 50 miles away, has helped in that. My kids are grown and on their own; and I too resent this constant financial and emotional drain on all our lives. We’ve given up, we fought and finally won some changes in court - but nothing that made any real differences. Its amazing how little the court cares about all this - to change custody at this point would take an act of god; not happening. We gave that up last year in the latest court battle.
This site is a great venting place. But, sad as it is, there is a point where you just say enough. We reached that in 2008. I see cutting with the son’s visitations soon (having a spy show up every 2 weeks to feed the ex’s sick obsessions); nothing is changing and this is so tiresome.
How long is someone supposed to keep fighting? Someone on this blog said ‘there is no reason a father shouldn’t see his kids”. Quite obviously that person has never lived through the hell we have been through these last 10 years; he is at 12 years of dealing with it.
To say I never signed up for this is an understatment. I was never buddies with my ex, but we had an unwrittern agreement to never haul our kiids through court and mess their heads up. Both are grown, graduated through college, healthy and pretty darn normal. Yes, I sucked up not getting child-support (he hid is money, as he owned a cash-based company - couldnt’ prove his income!) and awas scared every time they went over that they’d come back hurt caise my ex was so irrespoinsible with them. So, there are times that I think - how long can even I keep dealing with this?
March 4th, 2009 at 11:47 pm
I’m a middle-aged (it pains me to say it) grandmother of a beautiful little girl. I have raised 2 young men and have been divorced from their father since they were little boys. My oldest son had a relationship with the mother of my granddaughter, tried to do all the right things. He proposed, modest ring, flowers, promises. Helped her through a complicated pregnancy, helped her parent her older child, also a product of non-wedded bliss, from another man. Nothing was ever enough for her. Money was tight, they couldn’t go out enough for her. Her family made fun of him because he can cook. (It was a good thing too, otherwise it was a can of whatever.) She made up drama if they had a disagreement and went running home to her parents anytime she couldn’t get her way. Now they are no longer together. He has had to take her to court numerous times to exercise his rights as a parent. His visitation is at her whim, though he has joint custody, she pulls the rug out anytime she pleases and without notification. They work at the same place, he’s aware she bad-mouths him to his co-workers, and if he’s dating someone from work, finds a way to cozy up to them too. Now she called the police when they had a disagreement about her cancelling his days with his daughter without notification, and tells them he has threatened her. (Not!) It seems no matter how hard he tries to deal with this woman without being confrontational, she feels she can make up any bull*^#! and feel justified. He is a loving, patient, and kind father, encouraging his daughter’s learning and creativity. He’s learned how to fix his little girls hair, worries when she;s sick, makes sure she eats healthy meals, arranges play dates with her friends, reads, reads and reads to her some more. I just don’t get it. I am so tired of men portrayed on tv as incompetent idiots. I am so tired of the minimization of the role of the father. Children have lessons to learn from their father too. Children need the security of 2 parents working together in the child’s best interest. No matter what their feelings about eachother may be. My children’s dad and I have been divorced now for 20 years. Our relationship has evolved certainly. There have been times of tension and dispute. But….we never burdened the kids with it. We did not allow our families to discuss it in the presence of our children. We treated eachother with respect and upheld eachother in decisions about the kids. After all these years, we still consider eachother partners in our children’s and grandchild’s life. It breaks my heart to think my granddaughter and son may be facing years and years of this psychotic behavior, and I worry about the well-poisoning effect this may have on this little girl and her relationship with her daddy. In the meantime, we’re off to court again. Thank God for competent attorneys. Let’s hope the money doesn;t run out.
March 4th, 2009 at 11:56 pm
One last note. In my thanks I forgot to thank God for my ex-husband, the father of my sons and grandfather of our special granddaughter. He continues to step up to the plate for his son, as his son does for his daughter, and also pays the attorney fees.
March 5th, 2009 at 11:20 am
This site is very sad. Sad because it retells all the horror stories I went through and am still going through.
Great, so I get to look forward to 14 more years of this crap? Awesome!!!
My story is not unlike any of these. Sexual allegations, PPO’s to get me out of the house, abuse allegations, stealing my personal property, lying about her income, etc, etc. Watching my PEW do or say anything in court to “look good”. Hell I even remember our ref catching my PEW in a bold faced lie, under oath, and gave her 3 chances to “clarify” her story before agreeing on an answer. The whole time I felt like I was taking crazy pills.
I have walked in to 2 court rooms for custody hearings. I’ve walked out with my ass bleeding and a $20k bill.
My favorite thing is watching my PEW do or say the exact opposite that she hung me in court with. It makes for great entertainment.
The best part is the PEW remarried. Now this cat is okay on some levels. But here is my problem: He gets every other weekends with his daughter, but because he’s f*cking my ex, he gets to play the roll of father to MY daughter.
So after 2+ years of this crap, my new wife and I have come to a 2009 resolution” I won’t take any crap. If I’m lied to, I’ll call out the liar point blank. If someone steps over a boundry, I put htem back in their place….like dear old step dad telling me when and how I should call MY own daughter. Wrong move buddy.
See, I’ve been through hell with this. I have the famed McDowell blood in me. I can fight forever (its a gift I know). And so I shall continue to fight. Fight for my rights, fight for my family, and most of all, fight for my daughter and to keep her smart and sane from the nonsense my PEW feeds her.
To all the fathers who share my story, I ask that you never give up on your children no matter what the cost,
March 18th, 2009 at 12:21 pm
Great site.! I too have been through a very similar situation. I want to say to all you fathers… there is hope. If you document like this website says, and do your best to do right… you can put your children in a place to be successful. I have been seperated for 6 years and divorced for 5. What started out as weekend dad now has full custody of all three of his children with NO PHYSICAL contact with their mother. On top of that, she pays me 1000.00+ a month and owes me 50k+ (I will never see it) of the original divorce settlement that was given to her based on her lies and half truths. you can do right by your children. My kids are happy, healthy and well adjusted. GO FOR IT. It can only get better!
One Happy Single Father of 3 beautiful and well adjusted children!
March 20th, 2009 at 9:08 pm
I am glad this site exists. I was beginning to feel like my hubby’s ex-wife was a rare and embarrassing person that made people either pity us or look at us funny.
The ex is bipolar, a drug user, and an alcoholic. She abandoned my stepson, age 7, when he was a baby and my hubby was a single dad until I came along. I am now like a mom to my stepson, and unfortunately he still has to see the ex-wife on weekends and during summer.
The ex really is nutty. She saw my hubby wearing a bandana, and accused him of being a porn star. She also thinks, for some odd reason, that I drive a Mercedes Benz when I drive a much cheaper car. Plus she has accused hubby of forging court papers that she herself signed. And she’s constantly moving because she turns almost everyone into her enemy (like calling her landlord a b**ch).
When she feels nice, she likes to ask lots of questions about my and my husband’s 4-month-old son, and wants to see him. My hubby finally told her she’s crazy if she thinks he would bring the baby to see her, so she stopped.
One time when she went to court with my hubby, she tried to lie to the judge that I (then his fiancee) was a minor! I am in my 20s! The ex is in her 40s and is older than my hubby, so she was so jealous of us.
Not to mention how she treats my stepson. A few years ago, she sent him home filthy with summer clothes on when it was winter, and two mismatched shoes that were ALSO on the wrong feet. She also recently sent him home in size 4T underwear, when he is 7 years old. And she calls him profane names, and has talked badly about me and hubby. Not that the courts care.
March 24th, 2009 at 12:16 pm
This is not an impossible situation, but you must be diligent and as willing to call your EW out as she does you. The one thing a BPD does not expect is that you are going to fight back veraciously. They have spent years putting you in a place where you avoid the conflict by letting them have their way. They expect it will not change now. But it does slow them down when you call them out.
Do not call out all the bad behavior when it happens. Give her the opportunity to lye, cheat, steal on several occasions before you bring it to light. Catalog the incident and move on if it does not have an immediate impact on your child. Don’t think that you are just a complainer and no one understands your situation. This all over the media and trust me when I say Judges have seen it personally - but it has to be compelling.
I went through the exact situation with my EW - protection order, arrest, allegations, custody disputes…. During the separation I made the best purchase of my life. A digital recorder to record phone conversations. My second best purchase was a PI.
The advice I received from my attorney was “give her enough rope and she will hang herself”. He was right. The more I called her out on her lies, the more she lied to cover them up, eventually, no one believed her because they knew she was a habitual liar.
Although I have sole custody of my children, it has not stopped. She will say or do anything to hurt me even if it means hurting the children. Accept that fact and don’t take it personally. You need to deal with a BPD from a place of emotional strength all the while keeping your children’s best interest at the forefront of everything you do.
Examine why you made the decision to get into a relationship with this personality in the first place. Understand that this all began with your decision. But that does not mean that you deserve this treatment. I am just pointing out that you need to investigate this history in order to release yourself from the shame and blame.
I do not pretend to have all the answers. Just an understanding that I should always do what is best for my children even if that means keeping my mouth shut. I hope they are able to have a healthy relationship in the future, but that is dependent on their mother and not me. I can only be there to support and help unravel the craziness so that they do not take it on as their own.
Good luck!
Mark
March 25th, 2009 at 5:07 pm
PSYCHOTIC PARASITIC PREDATORS.
Exacerbated and encouraged by the feminist agenda, to destroy the nuclear family and replace it with??????????
Pursued with extreme prejudice, a destructive divisive disease, a pervasive plague that contaminates contemporary society.
What happened to constructive common objectives based on LOVE!
A real woman wants to be a woman. To love and be loved. The feminists want her to be like their corrupt vision of a man. (controlling, abusive and powerful) An insecure IDENTITY crisis forms in the psych , which creates a psychosis. It often manifests itself as a bipolar condition. Stress to anxiety to depression, and worse.
Result
PSYCHOTIC PARASITIC PREDATORS.
Women have a propensity to feed on drama and conflict, and many seem to take sadistic pleasure in hurting others, and creating a self fulfilling prophesy where they can then cast themselves as the victim. A manifestation of their self entrapment and self harm, which is a tragic scream for what they really want, to love and be loved.
Many men also become psychotic and dangerous to women. Another self fulfilling prophesy of the feminist. The root cause may be the same. A man is conditioned to stop behaving like a man. An insecure IDENTITY crisis forms in the psych , which creates a psychosis. It often manifests itself as a bipolar condition. Stress to anxiety to depression, and worse. A tragic scream for what they really want, to love and be loved.
The most horrific and tragic damage created by the vile ideology of feminism is to our children.
All we can do is refuse to participate in this grotesque game. Fight hate with love. Have empathy for their pain and internal conflict. Reassure them about their insecurity. Be a man! ( A woman said “you’re a man, you can take it!!!!” I’m a fragile human being, so is a woman.)
The defensive position; don’t marry, don’t have children, man live with man! (it’s more secure and financially necessary to share costs)
DON’T PLAY A GAME WHERE THE ODDS ARE STACKED AGAINST YOU.
Warn all young men you come into contact with.
You’re angel is far too easily corrupted by feminism.
My lovely angels were. What a tragedy for all concerned.
Until the rules change, we aren’t playing.
I seem to have a wonderful girlfriend now, but we’re not moving in together. I simply cannot afford to take the risk of another emotional, psychological and financial blow to myself or family and friends. I have no wish whatsoever to subject any other innocent bystanders to the repercussions of another break up. I’m too old at 56, and two divorces, aided and abetted by feminism, is more than enough for me.
I feel drained and exhausted.
If it wasn’t for my personal saving grace ( a sense of humour) and my Christian belief in forgiveness, I would have cracked.
I think feminists don’t believe in God? Maybe another clue to the source of their neo Marxist ideology?
NB! Yet another FAILED ideology of humanity, based on pride and arrogance.
“We can do better than God” Really?
I’m amazed at how much intelligence can be applied to doing something stupendously stupid, and self destructive.
Ask, who benefits from this situation? Who gains? Who loses? Who suffers?
Thanks if you read my rambling. I’m not a happy bunny. Does this make anyone happy?
Michael.
March 29th, 2009 at 4:42 pm
It was so nice to come across this site…I too have been dealing w/my husband’s ex for the last 3 1/2 yrs. I was starting to think I was the “only” one. The sad thing is after reading all of the comments…..there doesn’t seem to be any end. Even after the children have left the “nest”.
My husband and I have been together for 3 1/2 years and his ex started her crap 6 wks after we started dating. She is the one who divorced him, he trie for several yrs after to get her to try again to no avail…then when he decided to move on in his life, then all of a sudden she wanted him back. She doesn’t “want” him but doens’t want anyone else to have him either. From the harassing phone calls, the drive bys, following, turning the kids against their own dad, to having to hire security for our on wedding beccause of the threats from her, to the countless court appearances. From reading some the comments here I guess it could be worse, though at times it truly doesn’t feel like it. I feel like I have reached my limit more than once! Mister M..I wish you and your new wife nothing but happiness. Telling others about your issues helps get it off of your chest and not feel so alone in the world~
April 2nd, 2009 at 9:54 am
Well, i’m glad to hear that I am not the only one going through this. But let’s not forget the psycho ex-wifes family who involves themselves in something that they shouldn’t. It’s amazing who everyone take the mothers side. She may have carried them for nine months. But I have been carrying them ever since. The judges and the system everything is broken. They just go through the motions not looking at the facts or the true best interest of the children!
Carlos
April 3rd, 2009 at 7:53 pm
Bittersweet to see this site. Bitter of course that anyone has to deal with this type of mess, and nice to have a place to vent and ask for advice. My situation is alot like many of the stories that I have read. Dealing with a person who is crazy and bitter about life is no easy task. I have a 50/50 custody agrement for my son both legal and physical. I have done my best to communicate with the x and be civil. When trying to communicate with her I never truly get anywhere. At time of divorce she took off partied and did what ever she wanted I ended up having my son 28/30 nights of the first month 26/31 of the second month and about the same the third month. The sad thing is is that she despite all the documantation that I had she still belives that she was their and is a wonderful mother and is just the victim. Three years later she is still the victim in all of it and everthing in life. I could go on forever!!! We do need to find away to protect us and the people in our lives after from the crazy x’s. The mothers sane or not have to many rights over the fathers of the children. I understand the child support ,but many women abuse it making it harder for the man to move on with his life and start a new family. In my situation I take my son every chance I get every year I end up with mor days on the calendar spent with me than her but I am still obligated to pay. She has moved several times. I have stayed in the same place and have created a more stable home for my son!! What do you think can be done to give men more rights and protection against crazy x’s. lets all get together on this
April 5th, 2009 at 7:07 pm
my husband’s ex is psycho…but I also believe he played a part in her becoming that way…for the longest time, he was always at her families house for one reason or another, saying that they were his “friends”, or still refering them as his in-laws even though he had been divorced for over 6 yrs from them. It took counseling for him to see that he too was part of the problem and was enabling her into acting the way that she did/does. Thank goodness, so far, the court system has seen what a whacked out woman she is, even though their children havent figured it out yet. I think in time though they will. I still can’t tell you what a savior this site has been. After watching her drive by the house yet again, it is still so nice to know I am not the only having to deal with this. Even though I wouldn’t wish something this on my worst enemy.
April 14th, 2009 at 3:46 pm
Oh My God, I can’t believe there is a site called thepsychoexwife. It was a girlfriend in my case. I’m from Canada and believe me the justice system so far has been against me too. My problems are just beginning as my daughter was only born 4 months ago but already she is trying to get a restraining order on me for no reason and if I want to see my daughter I’m, supposed to pay for profesional supervised visits, I said no way. I was’nt too impressed when she told me she was pregnant in the first place seeing how we were just broken up for about two weeks but once I seen my baby girl being born I finally realized what true love is.I tried to make it work with her even offering to let her and her 12 year old daughter live at my house. It all went down hill from there, luckily she never did move in with me because I’m sure I would now be living in the street. Anyways trying to get someone to believe me that she is a psycho and I have never harmed anyone is where I am at now. I am definitely not looking forward to the next 15 years or so. Sometimes I just want to give up and tell her that I don’t want anything to do with my daughter problem is not only am I scared for her well being but I love her so much
April 14th, 2009 at 4:32 pm
Gerry… regardless of your love - if you haven’t already done so, I would urge you to get a paternity test. What you do in the aftermath is entirely up to you, but please don’t leave any options on the table.
April 14th, 2009 at 4:39 pm
Thanks Mr m, I am seriously considering this, the only thing that’s holding me back so far is that it cost’s about 1000$ for the test, but I’m working on it.
April 14th, 2009 at 5:30 pm
My story is like everyone’s here. In every post I read there is a similarity to my situation. Not one post didn’t have some aspect of what we (kids,me, gfriend) are going through. It is literally insane how these women are not known in the courts. Surely many “professionals” know that we have a new breed of woman that needs to be addressed.
If there is anyone in Portland Oregon what are your experiences with the family court here? Too everyone else. What are we going to do about this? We need to change this. Our young impressionable children love their mother, but shouldn’t be victims of these behaviors.
Enough is Enough.
Whats the next step?
April 14th, 2009 at 6:12 pm
Do it yourself, Gerry… it’s a LOT cheaper than that…
http://www.gtldna.com/
April 23rd, 2009 at 10:47 pm
We had my daughter’s confirmation today. The physco ex makes dinner plans afterward, does even mention it. I ask why I wasn’t invited she states she doesn’t have to tell me anything. She goes back in the house slams the door and calls the police on me.
A once in a lifetime event and I’m barred from participating fully in it. What gives her the right to decide she and she alone spends the day of a special religious event with our daughter?
April 24th, 2009 at 7:07 am
Society and the Family Court Cartel. They believe that mothers are the ultimately authority over the children and that father’s are best relegated to slave and cash-provider.
Your job and rights were done the moment you impregnated her.
Welcome to the plantation.
April 27th, 2009 at 9:58 am
Unbelievable series of events this reported to me this weekend.
I’ve been looking into drivers education courses for Daugher1. Our school district just cut them from the budget, so its off to the private schools - choice of 2 in our area. I found the one to have the schedule that best fits Daughter1. It Costs $600 (even our high school would have charged $275). I forwarded this information to both exwife and daughter1. Now exwife is telling duaghter1 to cum up with $300 on her own, obviously I would contribute the other $300. Is this woman crazy - where is aughter1 to come up with $300? And what is exwife doing with her 6 figure income?
Next exwife had her PA boyfriend over for the weekend. They went out on a date Saturday night leaving the kids home on their own. Duaghter1 had to cook for 7 kids! One of the kids was the boyfriend’s, kid’s friend! I could just imagine what would happen if I did that.
Then for icing on the cake I find out daughter1 has been moved out of her room so exwife’s boyfreind’s kids have a room when they come to visit. Duaghter1 is rooming in with Daughter2 and neither has a problem with it, but kicking a kid out of their room to make why for boyfreind’s kids is just wrong.
Oh yeah exwife has money to redecorate daughter1’s old room, buy more beds (for boyfreinds kids), go out on dates to a fund raiser, buy a brand new SUV, but wants daughter1 to pay for her own drivers ed.
April 29th, 2009 at 7:32 am
Yesterday I learned psycho ex wife has filed a restraining order to stay from the children except for matters of visitation. Thats right - no more going to a little league game, track meet, soccer game if it doesn’t fall during my patenting time. No bringing over forgotten items on my way to work. She went to court on Friday and was granted it (in NY they grant anything asked for). On Sunday (not my parenting time) I’m taking daugheter1 to beach - psycho ex is aware of this - 2 days after she got a restraining order! I was unaware of it at the time and still have not been officially served. Childrens lawyer called me yesterday asking about a trial on May 18. That was my tip off. This is the ultimate alienation attempt.
May 7th, 2009 at 10:42 am
But what can you do about it???? How do you get it to stop???
May 15th, 2009 at 1:43 pm
I feel bad for all the parents on this website that are going through these difficult situations. The sad thing is that the kids are the ones that suffer. I have an ex that I have been separated from for 5 years; 3 of those years he lived out of the country or out of the state. We are still legally married, but a year ago I filed for child support. My ex pays the mortgage on the house and I’m appreciative of that, but we have an Autistic son who requires a lot of expensive therapies and medications and dr appointments. I carry insurance for all 3 of our children, but even after insurance the out of pocket expense to me can be very large some months. I’ve been patient, asking him to help pay for a prescription or test here and there to which I always get (”I don’t have any money, and I’m 3 months behind on the house”) WHAT?????? Now keep in mind that he lives with his mother for free and does not contribute to any of her household bills. A year ago I filed for support and to this day he still has not been served. I call once a week and I just get “we’re very back logged ma’am”. I finally got fed up and e-mailed my governor (not really thinking it would work, but I had to vent). To my surprise I got a call this past Monday telling me that the governor’s office has contacted the Dept of Revenue and the Mr. P will be served within the next 14 days. I was floored. Now, it hasn’t happened yet, so we will see. But I have been very patient. He has even said, I want you out of the house as soon as possible and my response is, then I need my child support, because that is the only way I will be able to pay rent somewhere else. I’ve told him if he wants to speed up the process all he has to do is go to down to the DOR and turn in his financial information and we can get the ball rolling, but he doesn’t have time for that. This is also the very same reason we are not divorced. I’ve filled out the papers and the only thing we need to complete the filing is his financial information but he doesn’t want to relinquish it to me, not realizing that legally I’m entitled to it.
I spoke with the DOR representative today and she told me that he is going to be charged an arrearage amount from the day I first filed. Personally I don’t think this is fair since the DOR hasn’t really been on top of their game, but at the same time the ex hasn’t really been in a hurry to provide his info. I told the DOR that he does pay the mortgage and she said that they probably wouldn’t credit him for that but I can make the request that they do.
I commend the parents that live up to their responsibilities as far as visitation and support. Although I know its easy for non custodial parents to say “they don’t need that much support to raise a child” I always asked my ex if he remembers how much we struggled with 2 incomes and why he thinks I struggle less on 1 income. He never has an answer.
Mister M I don’t understand why you should pay support at all, but I don’t know what state you live in. In Florida if you have your children for at least 156 days out of the year in your visitation agreement, neither party is required to pay child support I hope things work out for you. Good luck
May 21st, 2009 at 3:08 pm
Wow … reading your background was as if I was reading my husband’s. My husband has gone through the wringer with Crazy Ex, and it’s never enough. I laughed out loud when I got to the part in your story about paying the toll on drop offs and pickups… our Crazy Ex tried to get my husband to pay her gas money for taking their son back to the airport for a flight she booked without talking to my husband about, on a day we were going to be out of town. It’s never ending.
I, have an ex-husband and a daughter with my ex. i would never, ever, treat him the way Crazy Ex treats my husband or their kids. Whenever he wants to see our daughter, I make her available. If there is a trip coming up, I give him as much notice as I can. I even reduced child support because he changed jobs and really couldn’t afford to pay the original amount - our daughter wasn’t doing without, so why should he starve to pay that ridiculous amount? I don’t ask for anything extra from him - I have a job myself and can provide for our daughter as well. The fact that some of other exes nickel-and-dime - it’s ridiculous!
Now my husband is sick and he’s afraid to tell the Crazy Ex because she will use it against him. This is the same woman who was “dying” from a brain aneurysm the month before he and I got married…. She’s that evil.
I will pray for you all the same prayer I pray for my husband - I pray that when his children are older, they will realize the brainwashing Crazy Ex did to them, and will come back to see him, before it’s too late.
hugs.
June 2nd, 2009 at 4:07 am
Crazy ex-wife, Ah long the topic of conversations between me and my fiance! We have a fairly unique situation in that my fiance’s little one has some kind of unknown syndrome. She has seizures & very little speech. She also is prone to ear infections & sinus infections and gets them pretty often. My finace has visitation every other weekend. Well, for almost a year now his ex has been refusing to allow him to pick up his daughter for overnight visits. So, basicly his visits are limited to Sundays and often not even every other Sunday. The ex states she is not well enough for visits. Although his daughter has had more illness recently, we believe she is manipulating the situation to keep him from his daughter. She has remarried and her new husband even called my fiance to ask if he could adopt his little girl! Of course, my fiance said “NO!” 2 weeks later we received notice of her request to increase his child support and that he is being dragged into court to try to further reduce his visitation. She is asking that he have one day a month!! Several days ago we picked up his daughter and she played here in the house and spent the last hour laying down watching a movie. The next day the ex called to vent her anger because we kept her for the whole day and now she was “exhausted and slept all day”. It it so hard to believe her because she has exaggerated and manipulated for so long. All we want is to see her every other weekend without interference and drama from the ex. The courts favor the mother totally in our experience and we do fear she’ll severely limit his time even more then she already has. We’ve had her charged with contempt for with-holding his daughter for overnights, so we’ll see where that goes. Probably no where. If anyone is in the same situation, divorced with a disabled child, please respond. We could use the support!!
June 2nd, 2009 at 11:07 am
I’M GOING THOUGH THAT AND I JUST FEEL LIKE IT IS A WAY FOR THE FEMALE TO CONTROL EVERYTHING THAT HAS TO DO WITH THE MALE. IF SHE HAS YOUR CHILD AND YOU HAVE NOTHING SHE IS GOING TO PUT YOUR CHILD IN YOUR SIGHT JUST TO GET WHAT SHE WANTS FROM YOU. WE CAN NOT LET THIS BE. FIGHT AND KEEP FIGHTING.
June 2nd, 2009 at 11:03 pm
I agree it is ALL about control. We go to court soon about this situation. I am living in fear that they’ll let his ex-wife say how and when we see the little girl due to her illness/problems. If they do that his ex will cut us out all together. Supposedly this is in the child’s “best interest” as she says. Of course only Mom gets to say what is in the child’s best interest and Dad is asked to “walk away”. Yes, she literally asked him to walk away from his child because that’s what SHE wants. I hate her with a passion. We’ll just keep fighting and fighting for our time with his little girl.
June 7th, 2009 at 11:50 pm
Just finished reading this and sounds like i should follow suit. Like many of you (especially Mark, we’re like two peas in one seriously !@#$ pod) I’m dealing with much of the same. After PEW stabbed me 20+ times, the first of which i was asleep she also abused our 3 children. So, after losing a pint of blood guess who got to go to jail,yours trully, no i’m not kidding. Two weeks later i finally get to come home because the states attorney saw through the b.s. and PEW was charged. Two months later it happened again(yeah i was trying to be a good husband and help her through the BPD, i know glutiny) both of us got arrested this time but of course her bail was half of mine. Ultimately i have custody of all three children and PEW has supervised visits but now she has convinced the courts to involve DCF (for which her friend works) but still hasn’t lived up to her end of the now two year old agreement. I’ve lost three jobs two wonderful girlfriends(you know the kind where if you argue you don’t end up bleeding)but i’ll give up everything to keep my children safe from the PEW. Thanks for letting me vent, keep fighting the good fight, and remember “life ain’t fair, if you got a pair.”
June 8th, 2009 at 8:34 am
Thank God for this website! It’s been six years since my husband and his ex wife have separated and she still continues to blame me for everything! She has MS and I truly believe the disease is affecting her brain. She recently found me on facebook and started sending me emails, telling me to move out of her house and leave her husband so that they can start their life over. My husband is a doctor and is very well respected and she too is a doctor but refuses to work! She has been in contempt of court so many times. She has accused my husband of beating her, yet wants to have a life with him again? It just makes me realize how nuts she is! We once were dropping off her son at their meeting point and I got out of the car to give him a hug goodbye. She came over and told him to not hug me, that I took his daddy away and I unfortunately spoke up and defended myself. She then filed a harassment charge against me and said that i attacked her in the parking lot. SO NOT TRUE! I regret repsonding to her in front of my husband’s little boy, but I don’t regret speaking up for myself. My husband has told her why he divorced her, how unhappy they were, how fed up he was with the name calling in front of their son, and her constant beating him down mentally. She doesn’t even try to understand it, she just says that I moved in on her happy family and ruined her life!! ?? We can not rationalize with an irrational person, it is just frustrating! Especially when I would never wreck someone’s marriage!
June 9th, 2009 at 11:37 am
Wow, I’m so glad I found this website. What horible stories! And I thought my husband’s pew was awful enough already! But reading all your stories make me thankful that she’s not as bad. Though it sure has been stressful enough over the past 14 years and my marriage at time was quite rocky because of all the tension she caused. But if she were like one of yours, I don’t think I’d have been able to handle it. She’s an alcoholic and has depression problems. NOt sure if she has BPD. But this woman thinks that everybody BUT herself is supposed to provide for her daughter. She doesn’t believe that she herself has any financial responsibility towards her daughter at all. Her parenting skill and belief are also severely distorted. My sd, as a result, had had so much trouble in HS, but finally got wise up and moved in with us for her senior year. She just graduated last week!!! Thanks God. Though this pew is not the litigation-loving type, maybe she does, but never had any money for it and maybe because we paid more than what the court ordered and covered everything else on top of the basics. So she never had a good enough cause to take us to court. But what a piece of work! Everytime when there was any disagreement (mostly about parenting and sometimes money), she sure threw a big hissy fit, calling my dh names and everything. I can’t understand why he can be so civil to her… he said because of his daughter and I admire him for that. When my sd moved in with us, we continued to pay child-support for another two weeks. But that wasn’t enough. She asked for another 2 weeks but had no plans to send any $ our way to support her daughter for the rest of the year… not even a “thank you and sorry I know my obligations but I can’t” kind of things. So we said no more money. And my oh my she was pissed. She even dragged me into the email exchange calling both of us cheap and liars. I have no problems being called cheap because that is how we could make our financial obligations and save for college/retirement. But I do resent being called a liar. We never promised her more money! So of course I hold the grudge.
We live in a different state so for graduation the pew had to come to town for it. Guess what, my sd told her, without consulting with us first, that she could come and stay at our house. Amazing! either she has very little common sense or because we’ve been hiding our animosity too well. And this thick-skinned spycho would come if we had let her. I said no, hell no. I don’t even want her to set foot in my house for one minute, let alone staying. My sd is an adult now and we don’t have to associate with her mother anymore.
You all have my empathy. The US divorce court system sucks and is totally biased against the fathers regardless how screwed-up and disfunctional the mothers are. By doing that they screw the children, since kids growing up with disfunctional parents end up being disfunctional, either via genetics or lousy parenting. It is truely sad!
June 9th, 2009 at 1:34 pm
another petition for contempt on me today. 17 pages of lies again. another lawyer bill 2500, another gf lost that can’t deal with constant threats and verbal abuse,havin a wonderful day and its just lunchtime.thanks PEW
June 9th, 2009 at 3:55 pm
Hello, Bull… very sorry to hear that. It might be time to file a counter-petition for contempt for her filing “unsworn falsification to authorities” and, at a minimum, go for your legal fees and other sanctions that would possibly have an impact on her unmitigated litigiousness.
June 23rd, 2009 at 1:28 am
my story is sick and twisted. I met my fiance now ex as he was just getting into the custody battle of the century. The ex broke into the house and attacked me in the middle of the night to kick it all off. I had a temp restraining order but the judge quickly took that away and slapped the father with a hefty child aupport and spousal support bill. I felt bad and told him i would help him out for a year. I gave him a car, paid the rent, bought his kids new wardrobes and beds in our 5 bedroom house to avoid unecessary contact with the crazy ex wife. she accused him of everything under the sun and he borrowed thousands of dollars from me to continue to fight to see his kids. tHe year turned in to two and then three..I grew weary of the constant drama and was ready to leave when I discovered i was pregnant. I stayed. Then the attacks from the ex ramped up when she discovered i was pregnant. She convinced the kids that i was the only thing standing in the way of them seeing their father and told them how to poison me. After the baby was born she sent the kids over with contagious skin diseases, sicknesses and refused to tell us about it. I was mama bear with my abay and trying to get some protection fromt he court. They gave nothing and told us we should jsut all get along. great if the ex wasn’t bi polar..psych evaluaion (that i paid for) revealed this. We filed , I paid and we fought as a result of the stress. The ex finally gave up after the custody battle but it was too late for us. I ran out of money and he ran out on me. Now he’s back in touch with her..buddy buddy and I’m worried about her being around my baby during his visitation. I know she is trying to get him back and the only thing that stands between him and her is the fact we have a child. Does anyone have any advice for me? I feel played by him –now he denies that he owes me a cent and barely gives us money to live. I live off of nothing and trying to get my career back. He wont help with the baby and is verbally abusive when I ask him for money for food. Help! Someone must know how I can keep her away from my baby. The money situation is something I will have to deal with in civl court. Thank you for reading and any advice.
June 26th, 2009 at 8:57 am
Here’s a real winner:
Cops: Woodmere woman tried to set husband’s home on fire
BY SOPHIA CHANG AND JOHN VALENTI
sophia.chang@newsday.com john.valenti@newsday.com
10:23 PM EDT, June 25, 2009
A Woodmere woman poured lighter fluid on her estranged husband’s baby and throughout his Hewlett Bay Park home in a failed attempt to kill him, his fiancee and the baby because she was angry over money and custodial issues, authorities said Thursday.
Esther Hershko, 49, of Andover Lane, a former Hebrew teacher, never got the chance to light a fire early Wednesday in the home of Itzhak Hershko, her estranged husband, police said. Her husband’s Havanese dog went into seizures, alerting the homeowner, and a neighbor called police after seeing suspicious activity, officials said. Hershko was caught fleeing the house and her sport utility vehicle was found with matches and lighters inside, police said.
Two other relatives were in the home at the time, said Det. Lt. Stephen Palmer. One was the Hershkos’ son, 25, Palmer said. A cousin of the son, also 25, was also staying at the house.
Palmer said it was unclear if Esther Hershko knew her son and nephew were there.
The infant is a 5-month-old girl, believed to be the daughter of Itzhak Hershko and his fiancee, Dawn Ziccardi.
Esther Hershko was charged with five counts of second-degree attempted murder, first-degree burglary, second-degree attempted arson and fourth-degree possession of a dangerous weapon. She wore a hospital gown at her arraignment Thursday. Her clothes were being tested as possible evidence in the case, Det. Lt. Kevin Smith said.
Her Legal Aid attorney told Judge Robert Bruno that Hershko has cancer. Hershko is being held without bail.
She and her husband have been estranged for six years, said assistant district attorney Christian Kubic.
Around 4:30 a.m. Wednesday, Hershko entered her husband’s Heron Drive home through an unlocked glass door and poured charcoal lighter fluid throughout the house while the occupants slept, officials said.
Hershko also doused the baby, Kubic said. Palmer said the girl was sleeping in Ziccardi and Itzhak Hershko’s room.
When Hershko went outside to look for a match, she was met by police sent after a neighbor called 911 because of suspicious activity, authorities said.
There were no reported injuries, and police said the dog is expected to recover as well.
June 26th, 2009 at 10:35 am
I understand where a lot of you are coming from. I share my husbands 4 children from a previous marriage. We at one point had custody of the children, until she felt she could handle it again and lost. Since then her psycho mentality has increased to a point where he has barely any contact with the children. We even went as far as giving the oldest a cell phone to keep in touch. The courts dont care about who’s the better parent. They especially hate it when the step mom out shines the real mom. Ive been called a nuscience by the courts, all ive simply done is love those kids and provide for them. The courts still have hte mentality that the kids belong with the mom no matter if she is a crack whore or an abuser or is a leach to the welfare system. We have been dealing with this for over 4 yrs and 10,000 + dollars later. Every time my husband seems to lose more rights to those kids than gain. Its ridiculous! ITs gota stop!
July 1st, 2009 at 6:47 am
Just got done with another family court appearance. I was filing for a change of custody since my ex wife has broken virtually every clause in our custody agreement. She sought and was granted an order of protection barring me from seeing the kids any time other than court ordered visitation. That was done exparte - meaning I wasn’t present in court. Of course she lied, but the court keeps putting off the hearing date, now to October - 3 months! That’s justice? Of course they were quick to quash my 16 page complaint. They looked at each issue on its own rather than as an entire pattern of alienation. Motion dismissed.
I also had to endure ex wifes lawyer stating my 14 year old daughter was regularly having sex in my place and was hospitalized for some condition caused by this. Of course no medical records to back it up, not even the name of the hospital.
To top it off my 16 year old daughter threw a beer party at ex wifes house and now I’m being blamed as a bad parent for letting that happen. Even the kids lawyer is chiming in on that one. How can I control what goes on my ex’s house? Especially since there is a stay away court order in effect.
I’m just so frustrated at the moment I’m even thinking of walking away from the kids to spare my sanity.
July 1st, 2009 at 9:59 am
Mark… we understand completely and you wouldn’t be the first parent we’ve come to know who have just walked away from such madness.